Fri, Dec 20, 10:51 PM CST

The Fog.......Part 2

Writers Horror posted on Oct 10, 2008
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Description


It seemed Cassie had been walking forever through the ghostly dense fog. She shivered with cold, the thin nightie giving hardly any warmth at all. She was sure she had passed the neighbor's house by now and she could see nothing around her. Her eyes were open wide and darting back and forth, looking for anything familiar. But it was to no avail, the fog was just too thick to see anything. The one thing she was sure of though was that her ears were working properly because the haunting cry of the dog was still a very real part of this ordeal. Suddenly she did see what appeared to be a light glowing a pale shade of yellow just up ahead. A Halloween light she was sure, possibly placed within a window. She picked up her pace and walked toward it. It was most deffinately a light and it seemed to beckon to her. She felt better knowing she had not missed the house afterall. Her feet were numb and cold, making it even harder to walk through the blinding fog but walk she did and in a hurried pace. "I just want to be warm" she voiced out loud as she turned in to the drive. The house sat back further from the road then she remembered it to sit but she shrugged it off thinking maybe it was just the fog making it appear so far away. When she reached the end of the drive her eyes widened with fear. Before her a huge, abandoned house sat, looming over her. She knew right away that this house was not her neighbor's home and it sure wasn't a house she had ever seen on Browns Run Road. But it had to be here, she thought, because she had never left her street, she hadn't even made a turn. She allowed logic to enter her thoughts, it was just the fog, she was sure of it, the dense, gloomy fog that had made everything seem so unfamiliar. She stepped up on to the porch, hearing the rotting wooden steps creak under her bare feet. She looked up to the night sky, the moon, like a glowing face was floating across the darkened sky, barely visable through the clouds moving past it. In the distance she heard thunder rumble with the promise of an upcoming storm. She moved toward the door and took a deep reassuring breath as she knocked upon it. She waited for someone to answer but in vain. No one came. She knocked again, louder this time, still no one came. Then she realized there was an eerie stillness around her. Not even the dog was howling its morbid cry. The only sound she heard was her own beating heart as it pounded in fear within the confinement of her chest and her own teeth chattering in the cold, damp air. "Come on," she heard herself say, "Someone, anyone, please come to the door." She knocked harder against the heavy wooden door and much to her surprise it slowly creaked open allowing her to see inside. In a hoare whisper she said, "Hello?" No one answered. She stepped inside. The stench from inside filled her nostrils and she covered her nose and mouth with her hand. "What is that?" It smelled of rotting flesh and mold. She just about turned around and ran out but logic again told her she must find someone if she ever hoped to get back in to her home. The first thing she decided she needed to do was find a light switch. She ran her free hand along the walls but found nothing. Somehow she knew that she wouldn't. She realized she was in a kitchen as she walked and ran her hand along the long counter top, her hand feeling the slime upon it, as if it had not been cleaned in a very long time. Her mind was racing, telling her to leave but her feet moved on in desperation of finding someone to help her. The dreaded gloom filled the pits of her belly, telling her she didn't belong here yet she forced herself on as her hand came to the end of the long counter and came to a rest on the edge of a wall. She turned, facing what appeared to be a library, the tall, shadowy book shelves reaching almost to the high ceiling. She stepped inside. A burst of coldness swept over her causing her flesh to crawl. The stench became stronger and again she heard the gruesome howl of the dog. Could he be leading her or was he warning her to leave? She didn't know but she was beginning to accept the fact that everything about this house was not normal. She knew in her heart that there was no one here that could help her because the truth came flooding to her mind... This house was not on her street, it was not even in her neighborhood, yet it was here and the only live occupant that lived here was the dog with its horrible, bloodcurdling cry. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~TO BE CONTINUED~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Comments (12)


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1010

12:42PM | Fri, 10 October 2008

I shutter with fear for her............

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nosetackle

1:29PM | Fri, 10 October 2008

You're a good writer Marlene. Can't wait to see how you wrap it up!!! Dennis

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myquad

2:44PM | Fri, 10 October 2008

Alright! More superb writing. Excellent suspense!

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Hendesse

3:05PM | Fri, 10 October 2008

Wow...very impressive story.

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davidoblad

6:56PM | Fri, 10 October 2008

Sure got my attention Marcy. Very good story so far. "The Phantom House" that only appears on halloween. Complete with hot and cold running shivers. Can't wait for the next installment. Bravo and hugs from Dave :^)

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ontar1

8:36PM | Fri, 10 October 2008

Wow, that girl is braver than I, very eerie, yet drawing you in, excellent work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Jay-el-Jay

9:50PM | Fri, 10 October 2008

A good creepy tale.

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mikeerson

1:20PM | Sat, 11 October 2008

I've heard of the "Hound from Hell"... This must be the Hound from Hell's House - lol... I wish you would of let your imagination just run with 3D art when you were thinking this all up.

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photostar

7:21PM | Sat, 11 October 2008

I'm wondering if she is having a nightmare.

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Anain

4:05AM | Sun, 12 October 2008

Every time I'm more intrigued and frightened by what fate may lead him to Cassie. Sorry for my inglish :(

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Chipka

9:08PM | Sun, 12 October 2008

Oooh. Ooooh. This is some good stuff! I love the casual way in which your descriptions simply roll forward at their own pace. In writing, pacing is such an important thing that a lot of people simply fail to grasp. Okay, it's fair to tell a story in as many words/scenes as is necessary, but there is the trap of overwriting, which is something you don't have to worry about. I love the pace of this, the flow, the whole manner in which readers are drawn in to a tale that is ultimately one worth caring about. Good stuff here. Okay, another little critique...again it's insubstantial, really, but your artwork is good and I'd LOVE to see some of the possible renders you could do as a kind of "cover art" for each chapter...but that's just me...always wanting more! Great stuff here though; it's going good!!!!!

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vaggabondd

8:10AM | Tue, 14 October 2008

Vary scary, I am holding on


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