Raskel by tennesseecowgirl

Photography • Animals • posted on May 06, 2010

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Description

This is Raskel, she is nine years old and spoiled rotten like any good cat should be. A friend of mine from California sent me this joke and for anyone with a cat that has had to give it medication you will relate, I can remember giving Raskel some prescriptions I had to sit on a chair hold her on her back with my legs around her, hold her head with one arm to keep her still and force the thing to take the pill she fought me every time we went through that scene every night for about two weeks, I showed her who was boss. I had the scratches to prove it. I hope you read the joke and laugh as much as I did.. Have a super day! How to Give a Cat a Pill 1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow. 2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process. 3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. 4 Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten. 5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse in from the garden. 6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously. 7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail. Get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. 8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw 9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans and have a stiff drink to take taste away. Apply band-aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap. 10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Have another drink. Place cat in cupboard, and close door onto neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band. 11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Have two more drinks Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply alcohol compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back some more shots. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom. 12. Call fire department to retrieve the damn cat from the top of the tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap. 13. Using heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed, tie the little *%^'s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour two pints of water down throat to wash pill down. 14. Drink everything left in the house. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room. Sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table. 15. Arrange for RSPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters. How To Give A Dog A Pill 1. Wrap it in bacon. 2. Toss it in the air.

Comments (98)

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jmb007

1:10PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

superbe chat!!!!

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necrophage

1:11PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

excellent closeup - beautiful cat!

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alessimarco

1:18PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

Funny story...been there and dont that!!! :) Excellent shot of your beautiful furry friend!

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fluffykatt

1:35PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

She is soooo beautiful, looks at lot like my tom cat Tiger. He weighs 20 pound & is a lover, I should have named him Romero, oh yes he is also spoiled rotten.

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aureagle

1:41PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

LOL!!! Big time... this made me laugh so much that I could've waked the neighbours!!! A beautiful shot and a really really beautiful tutorial!!! :) :) :) LOL!!! LOL! LOL!!!!

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Faemike55

1:49PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

wonderful picture! judging by his expression, it appears he has NOT fully forgiven you for the pills methods described to give cat pill is up there with the chili contest and the taser story

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Carlazzo

1:51PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

Beautiful cat.

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brycek

1:53PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

Beautiful cat..she looks like my daughters kitty. Love the story!!

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ocoee53

1:56PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

Beautiful shot, Lynell. I used to always have a cat or two, but these days I can't spare all the blood. It's dogs only for me!

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cheekyelf

2:00PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

She is a beautiful cat she looks like my cat who was a boy who sadly passed away 2yrs ago in nov.love the tablet verse,can relate to that,on more than one occasion lol!!!

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knupps

2:00PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

You should be a vet. Now we know all the tricks. Thanks. LOL....hehe.... Nice picture by the way...... :)

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flora-crassella

2:06PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

wonderful cat portrait!!!!!

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anitalee

2:06PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

beautiful

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jarmila

2:06PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

great portrait, fantastic nice eyes

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jayfar

2:11PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

Great image. They say it is impossible to bath a cat though I have never tried!!! lol.

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dragonmuse

2:34PM | Thu, 06 May 2010

Beautiful pic. I have been through similar steps bathing cats.. Used to have to wear my riding gear, including gauntlets.. remove everything that could be broken or ripped from batroom.. and lock the door. Would still be a battle royale.. but had to get the skunk scent off somehow (only reason to ever bath a cat).

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