i do not know where to start, i'm so lost for words and so very hurting right now. my/our dear friend Blush/Susan has lost her very, very long and painful battle with cancer, not sure if it was friday or Saturday yet, i will be calling her son in Kentucy to express my sadness, and i have only reposted images maybe twice since being here, not much into that. but i'm so mentally drained at this moment and have lack of any idea what to create so i searched my gallery for something that fits my feelings for my dear friend. i cannot explain how sad i feel. she has had several bouts with this killer disease and did loose the battle with it. forgive for any mistypes or spellings, very hard to write with tears in the eyes, and this small azz comment box sure does not help. some of you know her by her extreame kindness and her top notch photography, in my honest view she was one of the finest photographers ever. i so much respected her work and kind heart. when she lost her husband Danny last year on June 15th i think she really had alot to deal with. but she is a angel in heaven now and i guess best of all if those words are right, she no longer ever has to suffer anymore. i ask god to take me instead of so many wondeful people on this earth from cancer. cause i feel i'm not really a good person. can't elaborate on that. my heart is broken and i feel Susan was my real lil' sister to me and i have lost a very dear family member, i cry, i cry, i cry. i know at times she mentions her condition to me and in comments on other fine works and on her posts when she did them. i recall a few years back some artist gave her crap about posting her condition and that so pissed me off. i honesty have prayed every day for her for several years now and still will. i'm not going to link a post from my last image here, but will link my dear little sis's gallery link below, please, please visit and say a prayer for the Vessels Family, her son has lost both his parents in a short time and i do not know him, but i'm sure that pain is unbearable. i have never ever met her but like i mentioned she was a family memeber to me and i grief alot, back in 1999 i lost the dearest friend KIm and sweetheart and the love of my life, but never was a girlfriend. she was killed by a car in the street. and i feel equal pain and grief. and i'm not sure if i can create another beautiful image for Susan at this time, so i elected on this repost. forgive me. i completed a great image last night, but it does not convey the sadness for this moment, but i know dear Susan would still have loved it for this moment. i thank you all for reading this if you did and hope you can share a thought and a prayer for one of rendos best people ever. i will be sending a card to her son, and if anyone of you would like to do the same plz site mail me and i will share her kentucy address. just wish i had the cash to send flowers, unemployment sucks and still have not recieved a thing. i will post the image i made on Monday. then try and come up with another for my friend. her gallery link below. many thanks for the visit and thoughts. http://www.renderosity.com/mod/gallery/browse.php?username=Blush i might catch some flack about posting the song by Eric Clapton below but right now. i feel so much grief and this song is so beautiful. Would you know my name If I saw you in heaven? Would it be the same If I saw you in heaven? I must be strong And carry on 'Cause I know I don't belong Here in heaven Would you hold my hand If I saw you in heaven? Would you help me stand If I saw you in heaven? I'll find my way Through night and day 'Cause I know I just can't stay Here in heaven