Silent into Camelot by JoeJarrah
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Description
Her journey is over. Finally the river brings the boat to rest at the quayside in Camelot, interrupting the evening's revelries in the palace. The laughter falls still as people rush out to the quayside to see....
The endings of the two versions of the poem differ markedly; once again, I have preferred the earlier text (the later version has Lancelot commenting on how pretty she is, which seems a tad trite):
They crossed themselves, their stars they blest,
Knight, minstrel, abbot, squire and guest.
There lay a parchment on her breast,
That puzzled more than all the rest,
The wellfed wits at Camelot.
"The web was woven curiously
The charm is broken utterly,
Draw near and fear not – this is I,
The Lady of Shalott.:
I rather struggled on this one; I had in my minds eye something more overtly narrative; the boat bumping the quay, knights and townsfolk looking on, the whole thing in some sort of grand pre-Raphaelite tableau... but my runtime and (and hardware) simply aren't up to it. So... back to the drawing board and the opposite extreme, no other figures at all but using other elements to imply the narrative; far from m y original idea but I'm still reasonably pleased with it; see what you think...
Comments (14)
goldie
Perfect POV...and there are times when less is more...an excellently crafted scene...
JoeJarrah Online Now!
Thanks Goldie much appreciated!
bucyjoe
good
LyleAryn
Once again, great work with this set! I've really enjoyed following it along.
BellaDark
There is a really haunted feeling with this for me the way you've done it, and that's a great thing. From the overhead perspective, I can hear those ripples lapping and echoing through the empty stone chamber. You almost get a sense, too, that her spirit is hovering and looking down over her body. This is so beautiful. :)
JoeJarrah Online Now!
Thanks so much Bella; one of the reasons I prefer the last verse of the original version of the poem is that its left with her, slightly open ended
RRun
Very well done. Excellent cam position.
hashdoc
very nice pov!
Kordouane
I'm very happy to see your new publication which is superb
JoeJarrah Online Now!
Many thanks and welcome back :)
Greywolf44
I think the singularity of the central figure is perfect!!! That being said (slight cough. . .) if your resources were being stretched, maybe putting shadows of the town folk lining the bottom portion of the dock would have worked as an implied gathering of muted bystanders? Just a thought.
JoeJarrah Online Now!
Thanks Greywolf, and that's a good idea, didn't occur to me! i could use 2d cutouts to generate the shadows and it would keep the scene light.... one to bear in mind for the future.
Flint_Hawk
With your POV & lighting you have achieved a very dramatic scene! Great job!
UteBigSmile
Wow' this has become breathtakingly beautiful!
jmattatall
very interesting perspective
miwi
Fantastic work,excellent done,very beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!