Of nothingness and darkness by cagewench

Writers • Abstract • posted on Oct 25, 2004

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Description

Warning, re: content This poem contains the "F" word, used as a verb and, also, the word "rape" but not relating to actual acts of rape so if this may offend you, please move on. Honestly though, it's a poem. I don't find it offensive (but, yeah, I wrote it so that makes a difference) but, because I am unsure how to TOS really applies to poetry (even after re-reading it) I tend to err on the side of caution and place warnings. Now, if you managed to wade through all that, on to the poem... ___________________________________________ Of nothingness and darkness
the harder I pull the tighter I am bound like a fucking pair of fingercuffs
the more I rage, the more hurt I create the more I cry, the more empty I feel
I'm quivering and I'm grinding my teeth while my stomach acids rape my throat
I feel blind and deaf and dumb thrusting myself against padded walls wanting them to be concrete
so that my body may be as broken as I feel so that the blood will flow, reminding me that I still live
I purge and I purge and I purge to what end?
I will always be alone inside my head even with these bitter, biting voices the darkness is my other face is nothingness this one? ___________________________________________ The pic is one I took while my hubby was putting gas in the car, the sky looked cool so I took the shot, however, a birght blue sky and white fluffy clouds don't fit with this poem so I flipped it to a negative image and then colourized and upped the contrast.

Comments (14)

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IgnisSerpentus

10:14AM | Mon, 25 October 2004

Brilliant work!!! and LOL at the cursing... I often find cursing actually relays a message much clearer and precise than saying something more literary does - but I have a filthy mouth most of the time hehee. I love the analogy too - "Like a fucking pair of fingercuffs" lol those things are nearly damn impossible to escape.

netsia

10:14AM | Mon, 25 October 2004

'I will always be alone inside my head even with these bitter, biting voices' Excellent work, I like this line most. There comes a time when quiet is reward for a well fought battle....been there. Remember, in your head, it is all in your hands. YOU have the power, sometimes digging deeper works for me.

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cagewench

10:20AM | Mon, 25 October 2004

Thank you ladies :) Glad you enjoyed it... It's actually prompted because of what's going on with my Mom. I can't take my mind away from the fact that my mother is dying and sometimes I feel I am driving myself insane...

bardobedlam

11:04AM | Mon, 25 October 2004

After I read your comment I reread the poem and realised that's exactly how I felt the week before my Dad passed away. I had to drive from KC to St Louis to see him on my day off and driving home I knew I would be back in a few days forhis passing. Very powerful poem.

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Doodles

1:09PM | Mon, 25 October 2004

A very moving poem. I can't even begin understand everything that must be going through your head. Some brilliantly constructed words here indeed.

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cagewench

1:39PM | Mon, 25 October 2004

Thank you :)

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TallPockets

3:38PM | Mon, 25 October 2004

"reminding me that I still live" -- yes, indeed. Welcome to what is called the human race. May you find Peace.

Rooster

5:16PM | Mon, 25 October 2004

"I will always be alone inside my head" I really like this line, I know what you mean!

Lissa_lei

7:57PM | Mon, 25 October 2004

So real, the words you rite, so esy to feel your frustration, the biting hurt, the need to bleed, I love your lines, and they comfort me.Thank you. Eccelent* Lina

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cagewench

9:13PM | Mon, 25 October 2004

I am glad this was well-recieved and didn't offend anyone... TallPockets: thanks Rooster: I like it when others truly understand :) Lina: thanks, I appreciate you reading when I know it's not your first language :)

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classyladytwo

9:48PM | Tue, 26 October 2004

Beautiful another one from the heart oh yes I know how you feel I lost my Dad suddenly over 5 years ago my mom over 2 years from colon cancer and saw her hanging on for live yet wanting to go to be with dad so hard very hard V wonderful writting Cara God BlessV

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