A Book about Men by B_PEACOCK
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Description
Isola and her boyfriend got in to a slight arguement about men and woman .He said was was going to write a book .And so he did .
Isola found the book and wondered if it was finished, because it was only 2 pages long .
This is what she read
The Guys' Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down.
Finally, the guys' side of the story.
We always hear "the rules" from the female side.
Now here are
the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON
PURPOSE!
1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big
girl. If it's up,
put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret
girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows
default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless
you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
Men are not that complicated .We are simple creatures with simple habbits .
Women are not from Venus and men are not from mars .So the title of my book is .
**We think with our penis and you think to hard** ;)
So what else did you think would rhyme LMAO
This I got in my email and I thought was pretty funny .Hope you did to .It was sent to me from my wife ;)
So the image is off color to match my humor today ;)
Love and Blessings
Isola by my Dear friend T aka Mutedbanshe and Ann ;) Love ya girls
Comments (51)
LaVonne
Wonderful! Image! So creative! And her expression....PERFECT! Excellent work and very funny!
brycek
This is wonderful Bobby..great expression and humor. Excellent!!
brat526
I have seen that e mail before, I found it very amusing then and coupled with your image it's very funny. Thanks for the chuckle...LOL I especially like her expression!! Excellent work!!!!
annemarie2
LOL!!! Thats all true!!! Thank you for the laugh today:)
Feliciti
lol thats funny :) excellent Image to this and nice Effects too!!
Digitell
LOL!! You are 2 funny!! Those rules are a hoot! Her expression...is like she is thinking "What the **** is this crap?!" Cute hair and pose! Love the coloring in this too!! Excellent render! :)
Shardz
ROTFL! About 99.9% of those rules have applied to my relationships (being broken I mean!). And yes, her expression implies she has no clue or interest in deciphering this mysterious tome (another classic irony). It's amazing to me how such a generalized list of irritations and situations apply globablly to millions of people! Imagine that! Must be something to it all. Excellent work, and this gave me something to chuckle about today!
Kinouk
I read the whole thing and luaghed all the way through it. Love the effect on the image! Hugz Bobby!
webmasterfossy
Happy new year my friend , exellent start in 2005. Fossy
Cyve
Very nice scene my friend ... sh'es realy beautiful and her pose is sooo great ... Nice character too ... I love this one !!!
cliff-dweller
LOL at this one! Great list! Wonderful job on this image...the expression is perfect and I really like the way you've finished it in postwork. Well done!!
Fogge
ROTFL! I love these facts! I must say that rule nr 1 is my fav.. =P And her expression is perfect too.. You'll get my VOTE for this one for sure. Excellent work!
Halcion
Thanks for the laugh :-) Excellent work!!!
BrokenWings
Love the expression on her face..lol..cool..Huge Hugs!
SeaCrystal
LOL that's funny Bobby!! Wonderful image, her expression is great!! Excellent artwork!! What a way to begin the new year with what men think important, but we all know girls still have the best toys :D and the boys want it!! LOL To dang funny!! :) ROFLOL
dtp
nice story luv it she got a nice expression cool.
fastburn
This is just to funny!! Thanks for sharing this Bobby, i needed a good laugh!!! The pic is perfect too my Friend!!!...Take care and Thanks!!..Dave
arwenone
Excellent image and expression!!!!Funny and wonderful work :)
Bez
ROFL, too true Bobbie, excellent work, I love it!
1010
hehehe, what a book, publish it! Love her expression too. Delightful image Bobby!
tony_br22
LOL what a wonderful text ... love the image, look at hear face expression .. ha ha .. super!!! Exlt work
ann0314
OK LMAO I have been married now for going on 7 years now and after that long you come to understand that MOST of this IS actually accurate...you give up on asking "Honey how's this look" cuz you know the answer will be a blank starring "Oh that's nice!" LMAO but that's OK cuz he won't ask me either for fear of the 3 hour explanation of my opinion LMAO....so it's all good LOL....really funny and I love the image that went with it...it fit perfectly :O) EXCELLENT JOB and HYSTERICAL...TY for sharing a good laugh :O) HUGS!!!!
pmt_monster
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA ..excellent
msebonyluv
LOL This is priceless hun!!! Excellent work on her and the rules!! Beautiful!!
Hawke
ROTFL, oh man I haven't laughed that much in ages. The image fits perfectly. VOTE
digi-b
ROTFL!! So much of this is so true. My favorite is "ALL men see in only 16 colors". After 30 years my wife still hasn't learned that one. Excellent image and thanks for the laugh!!
gillbrooks
LOL! I had that email too. You put it into an image wonderfully - excellent scene Bobby :-)
Avalonne
ROTFLMAO....Now THIS is priceless!!!! That expression on her face is just perfect....I love everything about this one :-)
JNH
I absolutely agree with everything, except the argument/comment thing. The next day is enough!!! A Proud Man :)
prog
LOL!! I love this one, Bobby!!! I especially agree with rule No. 1!! LOL!! Hey-that Oprah has really caused us guys a lot of trouble over the years!! EXCELLENT work, Pal!