A Book about Men
by B_PEACOCK
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Description
Isola and her boyfriend got in to a slight arguement about men and woman .He said was was going to write a book .And so he did .
Isola found the book and wondered if it was finished, because it was only 2 pages long .
This is what she read
The Guys' Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down.
Finally, the guys' side of the story.
We always hear "the rules" from the female side.
Now here are
the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON
PURPOSE!
1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big
girl. If it's up,
put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret
girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows
default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless
you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
Men are not that complicated .We are simple creatures with simple habbits .
Women are not from Venus and men are not from mars .So the title of my book is .
**We think with our penis and you think to hard** ;)
So what else did you think would rhyme LMAO
This I got in my email and I thought was pretty funny .Hope you did to .It was sent to me from my wife ;)
So the image is off color to match my humor today ;)
Love and Blessings
Isola by my Dear friend T aka Mutedbanshe and Ann ;) Love ya girls
Comments (51)
dolfijntjes
How did the couch feel? LOL Great rules but.....my marriage is a little different. Hubby hates sports and complains when I have to see it again. I hate shopping always have a headache when he's trying to get me to the market or the city to shop I love internet shopping with a cop of coffee. Great one thank you for making my day
redbeard
Really funny stuff, but very true! I heard Jeff Foxworthy on TV the other day saying men only think of 2 things. I want a beer and I want to see something naked. Isn't it amazing that all the info about men can be squeezed into 2 pages? So who do you like for the Super Bowl this year?
svdl
Yup! I recognize and support rule #1, all of them (except for sports, that doesn't interest me)! LOL! Fabulous image, that "yeah right!" expression is fantastic! And the color effect is a wonderful touch. Excellent! V
Faery_Light Online Now!
An amusing story and the image fits it well. Can't say as to how many men it's true for but my hubby actually spoiled me. He noticed what I wore, put the toilet seat down and listened to my pratter. I really miss that man. An excellent render once again.
Elfenone
LOL Bobby..that's hillarious.. Hope I don't get it in my email now.. LOL Wonderful image to go with it too S HUGE HUGS
Lucie
rhhhhhhhhooooooo........!!! ROFL That was too funny!!! Thanks for the laugh! I really like your image too, her expression is too much! lol
classyladytwo
kik wonderfulimage and love those comments lol tons of truth to each of them awesome work *V
jwdell
LOL, Awesome+++++++++++++++++++!! Love her expression most of all!! EXCELLENT!!!!
mari_e17
Wonderful composition, very beautiful image, fantastic, pose and expression!!!! Excellent work!!!! :) hugs**
Primal
i think i must live in another world....
GOLDILOCKSUK
Hahahahaha!!! Bobby seriously though I do like this image and her expression it's fantastic and what also tickled me was the comment above mine lol! Excellent pose with the open book (V) Cathy xooxxo
i-popba
wowwww..!!!! wonderful work Bobby...!!! very beautiful my friend..... V
eres
That's too much excellent and funny...!!!
MOOOW
Another fantastic artwork and unique style my dear friend with so beautiful colors and expression*VOTE
SophiaDeer
Hahahaha! This is excellent. Love the humor and her expression.
danob
Lol this guy seesm to know what it is like to live with a woman Happy New year made my day
STEVIEUKWONDER
Gosh, I am so behind Bobby. This is really lovely and I just HAD to smile at the "Rules" Superb facial expression. Very well done indeed. Happy New Year Sir! Steve :o)
chrislenn
lol what an insight just made to be rewritten ;o) excellent image too Chris :o)
SK2Design
ROTFL!!! I just love the expression on her face because it probably mirrors what a few of the ladies would look like. I just love that joke and I'm wondering how many guys were reading the list and nodding as they went. Fantastic! WLYB? I think you know. ;)
VigilAnnie
LOL! Love that expression.
Artzy
Wonderful!