The Chosen Exit by nocturnecsh

Writers • Realism • posted on Jan 15, 2005

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Description

Title: The Chosen Exit Scene: A small, one-car garage. The room is dark, but for the headlights of the running automobile that shine on the back wall. There is no dialogue; only the thoughts of the main character. Tom: (sitting in lawn chair next to car - head in hands) Just one more breath. That's all I need. One more breath. What does she know anyway? She doesn't care. She thinks I'm useless. She says she wants more. He'll never satisfy her. He can't love her like I have. Someone stable - she says. Someone with a career - she says. Someone who completes what he starts. I'll show her. One more breath. Think I won't do it? Think I'll run away? I'm more of a man than he ever'll be. More of a man than you can handle. I don't need you Katy. Go on. Just get out of my life. My life. My...life. My life is nothing without you. Go on. You'll find me and wish like hell you'd have stayed. But it's too late. I can't take it anymore. This is one project I'm finishing. Yeah. You'd

Comments (7)

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eternalwytch1

6:26PM | Sat, 15 January 2005

Great piece :-)

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shayhurs

6:38PM | Sat, 15 January 2005

Like it; Also recognize a Jeep headlight too (GRIN)

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TallPockets

1:45AM | Sun, 16 January 2005

Sad but superb piece. V

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Shadowmonkey

3:50AM | Sun, 16 January 2005

You see his decent through your writing.

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meico

6:45AM | Sun, 16 January 2005

It's a testament to your skill that I couldn't help but 'get involved' to the extent where I'm thinking "Hey man, don't do it ... Katy won't care once the embarrassment's gone." Proud? very unlikely. Regrets? none. Yeah ... man get in the ** car and really show her.

lmmv

5:20PM | Sun, 16 January 2005

it is amazing how few words you use yet you create a picture that is quite vivid....and your thumbnail only serves to enhance the vividness of your words...

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