BIO
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I have fluctuated between writing things about my state of mind and writing about my life as we know it. Most of the time I'd just delete everything and leave it all blank. I've decided to just ramble on from time to time and let the crap stay. Kind of a log file, just as hard to understand, and just as worthless to most...
May 08 2009: Posted an issue I feel strongly about. Alienate a lot of people. Need to talk to someone. Tried talking to friends but we are all dealing with the same s#it - the loss of a friend. Tried here on Renderosity. Nobody will talk.
May 14 2009: Took some time off to let go of some anger. Hope to post again. I really want to delete everything. Been a member since 2003 so I know how it works. I am just getting so tired of everything.
May 18 2009: It's so desperately sad that my life has come to this. I had hoped there'd be something better for me. I used to think I had something to say. But my private ideologies gave me away. I tried to keep my mouth shut but it's always the same over and over and over again.Today I got it wrong again but it's not surprise. Once more heaven has forgotten me. So everybody clap your hands together and close your eyes, as I watch my world collapse. Don't waste your sympathy on me because I made this mess. My mistakes happen with so much success but I drag you all down into my sorry mess. I said I was sorry but it's always the same over and over and over again. I have been doomed from the first time I tried to find something to say I kept hidden inside. It would be much better if I just smiled and lied. ...
June 5, 2009: Things are not good. I know I should blog. No body reads this. Most web users skim at best. So I am safe in leaving behind scraps of mental illness in my wake. Things are NOT good..
July 10, 2009: It's all turned the s#it - i'ts ALL s#it.
November 25, 2015: I am amazed that I still breath. Whenever I begin to feel as if I have no Hope, I hear a whisper in my ear that reminds me I AM STRONG.
...at least for one more day.
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Comments (8)
Splinter429
wicked man i love it
Zabeth
How right you are! Excellently done!
Synapse
That now-well-known quote springs to mind, I just can't recall who said it... "We spend more, but have less; We buy more, but enjoy it less; We have bigger houses and smaller families; More conveniences, but less time; More medicine, but less wellness." The Rat Race is well named, we've become like mice scampering on their wheels while forgetting what it's all for. Like a dog chasing its tail. We're supposed to work to live, not live to work. It's a sad time when human beings judge themselves by how much money they have, how they compare with each other, how they look, how they fit into the multitude. When you take a few steps back and wonder what the hell it's all for, it can feel lonely; but never forget there are those who share your outlook, many of whom you know here at R'osity. And our numbers are increasing. Take care Yo, and hang on in there...
briarwitch
keep sticking it out, hun. ~lost
cbender
will we ever understand the world...?!? i don't understand myself... so how could i ever understand the world...?!? another excellent piece of art, dear Yo. well you give a lot here... and - in some ways you teach me more about the world every time... another aspect... isn't that an important thing...?!? thanks...
bevchiron
And that's what they call sane! If you ever figure this world out let me know! Good work Yo.
Caithream
This is so true,so true!Clarely you have a gift of empathy that "sees" beyond the obvious.Millions conform and believe the are damn special,if only they knew.Excellent Art!!
ACS-001
So cool! Looks like a movie poster, I'd go see it.