It is a process.

Some people make a decision they want to be some type of artist, and do whatever it takes to achieve that, whether going to school, getting a job in the field or other means.   But that is not what happened with me.

It all began when I gave up.   That thing that I see many people say never do.   My way of doing things, my ideas, my plans and designs, and my self-determined objectives were a success and a failure at the same time.   Either they didn't work, or they worked too well and were never good enough. 

The entire creative process, whether it be art, photography, music or any other form didn't begin with me until I had surrendered my way and will.  Some of the best advice I ever took was when I had reach a point of despair, and a veterans counselor said to me, “Your life is pretty f'ed up, why don't you try letting life happen instead of making life happen.”  I was able to try that  then as I had nothing to lose and up to that point, fear of letting go was in the way.  And I  found life to be acceptable after ceasing fighting everything and everybody.

Still to this day, I am my own worst enemy, as all blocks to any creative success or any area of my life has been myself.  My old way of thinking creeps up, the ego, the all about me, the one word that is probably the most evil word in the sense of being counterproductive to creativity is the word “want”.   Not the same thing as desire, want, is when I want.  Having a desire involves other people, want is nothing but me.
So with nothing, which is a frightening place to reach, desire is born, and life begins anew with creativity.   The painters canvas starts with a blank canvas, just like a photographer starts with a fresh roll of film, or flash card these days, and I reached that point.

So now I begin each day I  try to employ these principles.  By not creating a personal agenda, I have free creative space.  And a clean palette for the day doesn't relieve me from responsibilities, instead it frees me up to meet them.  I find the most important asset of the entire creative process is being available.  I need to be available to receive,  and to stay out of the way.  Instead of making it happen, let it happen.  And it has been working for me, and I am thankful.

The results.
“Never look at the numbers.” Advice a good friend gave me.  I have tortured myself many times over the results, as they have never been good enough.  So it's best for me not to spend any time dwelling on them.   When I do, as it is sometimes unavoidable, I am almost certainly frustrated. I prayed on this and felt I received an answer when I realized the idea of do the work and leave the results to God.

Hopefully the results are being able to continue, to enjoy the process and that others enjoy or benefit.  I can't begin to define success other than to think it might be seeing results when I am not even looking for them, but the real success is just being in the process of creating.   Ry