SOCIALISM: You have 2 cows, and you give one to your neighbour.

COMMUNISM: You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.
FASCISM: You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.
NAZISM: You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM: You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one,  milks the other, then throws the milk away...

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The European Parliament requires  you to take harmonica lessons.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.

ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by  your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with  an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with  a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are  transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company  owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a  new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull.

THE ANDERSEN MODEL: You have two cows. You shred them.

A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike, organise a  riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.

AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. Business seems pretty  good. You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times  the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called cowkimon and market  it worldwide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they  live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You decide to have lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them and learn  you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.  You count them again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting  cows and open another bottle of vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship them.

A BRITISH CORPORATION: You have two cows. Both are mad.

IRAQI CORPORATION: Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell  them that you have none. No-one believes you, so they bomb you and  then invade your country. You still have no cows, but at least now  you are part of a Democracy....

WELSH CORPORATION: You have two cows. The one on the left looks very attractive.

IRISH CORPORATION: You have two sheep.

Too funny, Chris!

I see this has expanded from the original...oh, 'bout 20 years ago..;)

rofl!

Very funny!....liked the one about Enron venture capitalism the best.

WELSH CORPORATION: You have two cows. The one on the left looks very attractive.

I find that OFFENSIVE!

it was the one on the right.

"Where's my cow?"

(terry pratchett book)

I'm moving to Australia. 

brilliant! but i'm sure the french corporation would have set fire to the cows in the middle of the road.

:-)

Hilarious! Thanks for that!

Hilarious!

If you find my cows you can keep 'em.
The sheep and I wont' miss 'em.  :P

LMAO

I sent the Brysters list to a good friend of mine, who has family in the Dominican Republic. She got a response from them, and they had added to your list! :D

CUBAN MODEL: You have two cows the Russians donated during the cold war. They no longer give milk since they last tried to swim away. You call them state of the art, sell drugs to buy milk powder from the Chech Republic and export it to Syria in exchange for Chinese arms. You publish pamplets proclaiming the usefulness of boiled bark as a milk substitute.

DOMINICAN Model: You have two cows, you print 18 political party banners and tie them on the cows in accordance with the caravans passing. You donate one cow to the elected party and hold a large BBQ with the other in exchange for land rights and a public position in the Ministry of Mining. After two years you reinvest you salary in 400 cows and move to Miami in your second helicopter.

COLOMBIAN model: You have two cows. You kidnap one and ransom it for the value of a Mercedes.

VENEZUELAN model: You have two cows. One is an aristocratic capitalist, the other believes all land is public. You send them free vaccines, nationalize all the milk production and fix the price of milk artifiially low and the price of oil artificially high. You import whiskey and donate some to Bolivia.

ARGENTINIAN model: You have two cows. You devaluate until the liter of milk is costlier than a pound of gold. You elect a new president who can divide by 1,000,000.

PERUVIAN model: You have two cows. You send one to Japan and reelect the other.

KOREAN model: You have two cows, you reverse engineer them until they produce wine.

SOUTH AFRICAN corporation: You have two cows. One is black with white the other is white with black. Not being sure what is proper, you get them false passports and export them from Rumania.

ISRAELI Corporation: You have two cows, you send them to a technology park and teach them how to fly. You attach radar.

PALESTINIAN corportation: You have two cows, you wire them and send them into a busy market. You apply for international economic aid due to imposed poverty.

LEBANESE corporation: Where are the two cows that were just here?

:lol:  I love it! This could run and run!