The 2-line Halloween Horror Stories Challenge went fairly well, so now we're going to do The 2-line Christmas Stories Challenge. The Christmas stories are not horror stories. Think humorous, sentimental, or just memories of Christmas. I'll submit examples to get started.

Note: You can also include Thanksgiving, or other cultural holidays of your choice as well.

P.S. We gave some Reward Points to those that participated in the 2-line horror story challenge.

I like presents.
Especially when I'm getting them.

I don't know why my parents gave my brother presents.
They could have cut out the middleman and just gave them straight to me.

Don't try to trick me with squishy presents.
I know they're just socks.

Finding a present from Grandma was terrifying.
You know it's going to be something that if you wore it, you'd get beat-up.

When you find the long skinny box, you start chanting.
Please be a BB gun, Please be a BB gun.

"...and in related news, in the midst of the unrelenting struggles of war, Jewish refugees are being forced to seek shelter in the most unlikely places, like a young, pregnant woman from Nazareth, who gave birth to a baby boy in a stable. The child at this time has no name..."

And what do you want for Christmas Santa asked the old lady? She responded...All I want for Christmas is an eBook reader as she batted her eyes at him.

The worst job to have in the southern hemisphere?

Dressing up like Santa in the middle of summer.

Christmas. 

The only time of year we allow small children to sit on strangers’ laps.

Dear Santa, I know I haven’t always believed.

But if you make one of my games go viral this Christmas, I’ll believe in you forever.

When you’ve had a hard life and been homeless…

Then every day you wake up in your new forever home is Christmas.

Ohhhh... heart break... Merry Christmas puppers.

Kids are great actors when opening that bicycle wrapped in four rolls of Christmas paper.

"Gee mom, I wonder what this could be?"

Every kid knows Christmas is not free presents.

You pay for them by having to wear that embarrassing sweater Grandma gave you outside at least once.

The worst not funny Christmas mind screw.

When parents wrap small things in big boxes.

There's something wrong with Santa. 

He gives the kids with rich parents the best gifts and almost nothing to the poor kids.

~~

"These chocolates taste funny."

Hey kid, stop eating the reindeer poop.

~~

Do you remember the good old days when you asked for a mouse?

And meant a small furry creature.

~~

Santa magic

Breaking into someone's home and not getting shot.

@pandab5 That first one wins internet for the day!! It never occurred to me how messed up Santa is. I thought he just hated me.

Standing up at the family Thanksgiving gathering to declare what I'm thankful for.

"I'm grateful for my cousins showing me how lucky I am to have inherited the good DNA."

Thanksgiving is the most dreaded day of the year.

Every kid knows it marks the day you have to start being good for Christmas.

My brother gets caught playing spin-the-bottle in the basement at the Thanksgiving gathering.

But I'm the bad guy for putting one of mom's wigs on the turkey and telling everyone we cooked Cousin It.

I know how to make Thanksgiving better.

Add presents.

Ever get the impression the North Pole is run like a large corporation?

The elves do all the work and Santa gets all the credit.

Finally got all the lights on the Christmas tree and they look lovely. Wait, why does only half that string light?

Kids look outside and see snow forts, ice skating, sled riding, and glorious snowball fights.

Adults look outside and see a driveway that needs to be shoveled.

I'll stay on the lake skating until I'm blue.

Dad tells me to shovel the walk, it's too cold.

Listening to the radio in the morning.

Every school is on a snow day except mine.

I love a freshly snow covered yard.

It hides all the dog poop.

If dad didn't want you jumping in piles of leaves,

why did he make them in the first place?

When your mom lets your best friend in that showed up early to walk with you to school,

and you're still at the table eating Captain Crunch in your pajamas with feet and little pictures of rocket ships on them.

Christmas is watching Grandma open the presents carefully so the paper can be used again.

That's not my style. *rip*

What did the silly snowman say to the other snowman?

I can’t wait for summer!

~~~~~~~~~~

Why are there no snowwomen?

Women don’t stand around doing nothing all day!

Staring into my monitor I sat.

Not yet Thanksgiving I'm already Christmas fat.

 When mom spent two days making the Thanksgiving Feast.

And you ask for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

Christmas Eve traditions:

Watching Santa on the NORAD Santa Tracker.

Writing Santa a “Thank You” letter to put with the cookies and milk.

One last sweep of the house for hidden presents.

Watching your brother set his newest Santa trap next to the fireplace.

Reminding your parents that Amazon is awake all night, just in case Santa forgets to bring that thing you really wanted.

Pulling your stocking out of the trash where your brother just threw it.

Writing a secret note to Santa telling him how bad your brother has been.

Trying your hardest to stay awake so you can see Santa.

Try as I might

It's a Grinch kind of night.

I always wanted to stay at the Grinch's house for Christmas.

He had all the presents.

Unanswered social questions:

Do you wrap blind people's presents, or just hand them the box?

There's actually only one fruit cake in the world.

Everyone just keeps re-gifting it.

Jingle Bells Jingle Bells, jingle all the way.

Is it fun for the horse when you ride in a one-horse open sleigh?

Decorating the Christmas tree.
A string of lights go out.

Twinkle twinkle little star.

Oh, if only the lights stayed on, I wouldn't need to twinkle.

Grandma's house: Oven fresh 30 lb turkey, homemade gravy, ham, cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, carrots, corn, green beans, fresh pumpkin pie.

My House: Swanson's TV Dinner.

Grandma's house: haunted, they're all dead.

My house: fresh summer salads - eat your heart out Northern hemisphere!

First snow of the season means:

Catching snowflakes on my tongue.

Pulling my sled out of the basement.

Checking to see if my ice skates still fit.

Snowball fights.

Building a snowman.

And... mom dressing me in enough winter clothes to cross the arctic tundra.

Thanksgiving is a day of family, togetherness, and giving thanks for all your blesses.

Followed the next day by hand-to-hand combat with 300 people for 15 flat screen tv's at Walmart that won't fit in your living room anyway.

Christmas trees have two styles of decorations when you have little kids.

Either all the decorations are on the top half so the kids can’t reach them or they’re on the bottom because that’s how far the kids can reach to hang them

We had 2 trees growing up.

One tree had all the fancy store-bought ornaments, the other was the ones we'd made as crafts.

Once upon a time you got pretty Christmas cards in the mail to display.

Nowadays, it’s hard to display WhatsApp forwards in quite the same way.

I would rather get one drawing of a turkey made from a tiny traced hand,

than a dozen amazon gift cards.

He used to read us the Christmas Story, play the harmonica and wrap colored papers around the lights on the tree to give us kids the perfect Christmas.

We lost Papa two weeks ago and Christmas will never be the same...

Why did the women kick Santa?

Santa had called her a hoe three times.