A Texan, a Canadian, and a guy from Michigan are out riding horses. The Texan pulls out an expensive bottle of whiskey, takes a shot, then another, and suddenly throws the bottle in the air, pulls out his gun and shoots the bottle in mid-air. The Canadian looks at him and says, "What are you doing?! That was a perfectly good bottle of whiskey!" The Texan says, "In Texas, there's plenty of whiskey and bottles are cheap." A while later, not wanting to be outdone, the Canadian pulls out a bottle of champagne, takes a few sips, throws the bottle in the air, pulls out his gun and shoots it. The guy from Michigan can't believe this and says, "What did you do that for? That was an expensive bottle of Champagne!" The Canadian says "In Canada there's plenty of Champagne and bottles are cheap." So a while later the guy from Michigan pulls out a bottle of beer. He opens it, takes a sip, takes another sip, and then chugs the rest. He then puts the bottle back in his saddlebag, pulls out his gun, turns around and shoots the Canadian. The Texan, shocked, says, "Why did you do that?!" The guy from Michigan says, "Well, in Michigan, we have plenty of Canadians, but bottles here are worth a dime."

Here in Maine, we replace the Michiganer with a Mainer... -sk

I take it that someone hacked Jack's account. With all that's going on in the other forum, about the rewriting of posts with cute "regional" dialects, an ethnic joke doesn't seem appropriate... Ciao! Joe (from Detroit)

Joe, Why should events on the forums, either here or at the PFO effect my sense of humor or stress myself into a serious case of Hemmoriods? Lighten up, bud, it's just a joke... sheesh.. ::suddenly can completely understand the famous SNL William Shatner skit:: Jack

Speaking of which--I should be getting $20+ at the bottle return machines at the local Farmer Jack's

LOL very funny Jack :O) Nice ta see you are keeping a good sence of humor these days I would respond with another joke but most the ones I can remember are nasty and I don't retain jokes well anyways. Sprout :O)

heya; not to tell ya how to run yer place, jack, but shouldnt that go in the tavern area? ;) this here's a SERIOUS forum! :)

Damn, Im must be a redneck too LOL :o) Jack

We Canadians have used that joke for years but I'm pretty sure the one who got shot was from Tennesee(hope I spelt that right)and the one who saved the bottle and did the shooting was from New York in the Bowery. The Canadian was just an impartial observer.

Jack, I am truely sorry, but I don't know how to "effect" your sense of humor. But I assure you, I am sufficiently "lightened up" to appreciate your accidental word play. (actually, I found it orders of magnitude funnier than your ethnic joke). Perhaps you should concentrate on those facets: the clever turn of phrase, the double entendre, the Freudian slip, or even the Spoonerism. Please remember one thing: in the "Forum News and Team Contact" forum, you're "on". Here is where you have to take the high road. In the "Tavern" forum (as Bloodsong suggests), you can kick back, take your virtual shoes off (but for Gdd's sake, change those virtual socks), and crack as many jokes as you like. Also remember that the reputation of the managment of the other forum was, indeed, seriously damaged over an incident that a moderator also approached from the "it's just a joke" POV. Ciao! Joe

Joe, I think you are a little touchy, aren't we hmmm? I mean it is a BIG difference to take your post, run it through a program and make you look like a moron and then say it was all done as a joke. As I said, sabatoge is allot different than posting a simple joke. I posted it where I wanted to because, honestly, I prefer to offer something other than the US vs THEM bullshit that has been plaguing both forums. Just my 2 cents, sorry if you can't handle that. Jack

Hello all. In light of Jack's insensitive remarks concerning the shooting of Canadians, he has stepped down as an administrator of this forum, and has been sent to our re-education center in Toronto for Canadian Sensitivity training. Here he will "walk a mile" in Canadian (snow)shoes, drinking domestic beers and living in an ice hut. When he returns at the end of winter (July 15th), he will of course be summarily executed by a firing squad comprised of his fellow administrators. Because here at Renderosity, we have plenty of administrators, but jokes are cheap.

Doc, I'm glad to see that one forum has some real justice. Sorry, Jack, but like they say on Barretta, "don't do the crime if you can't do the time".

Doc; Spoken like a true administrator and one whom we can all be proud of. I only have one problem with Jack's punishment. Why should he get mollycoddled and given shoes at all. Just another thing to add to the reputation of sympathy and niceness we Canadians have been so wrongfully tagged with. I say no shoes ( not even snowshoes) and as an added punishment he be put on a road crew clearing snow with a toothpick like the rest of the ones doing time in Canada for uttering bad jokes about our beloved citizens.

Hmmm last time I checked Canada was a country, and Texas and Michigan were states. when did they become Ethinics? Just wanted to know in case I missed something. BTW funny JOKE Jack. :O) GeorgeD aka Havok

Ack! Here's a prime example of how posting messages on the internet gets taken differently than the sender meant it. I got the impression that Wiz's first post was a message to defend Jack. Not knowing that it was really Jack who posted the joke. Then his second post looked like an apology to jack from my perspective. With some reasons why Wiz thought it might have been posted by some trouble maker. Then jack seemed to not see Wiz's second post as an apology and kind of got defensive and frustrated that his attempt at making us feel better was met with resistance. I could be wrong about this whole thing. But do you guys see how easy it is to post something and have someone else turn it into something you never meant in the first place? Are you guys still friends? ScottA (wannabe psychiatrist G)

well, since jack is my best friend and my family is FROM Canada, and i'm not about to leave a friend hanging... ship my canuck ass to sensitivity class too!! ;) How do Canadians spell Canada?? C-eh-N-eh-D-eh! (i've told this joke HUNDREDS of times in a blues bar in downtown Detroit right by the Tunnel to Canada--yes, TUNNEL... all of them were proud Canadians visiting from Windsor; which across the Detroit River from us, and every last one laughed their asses off) hmmm... or considering how cold Canada can get, perhaps their asses were nearly frozen off to begin with.... ed

HEY!!!! THAT'S T-E-N-N-E-S-S-E-E calandil! It's a good thing you're from GA because that sounds suspiciously like a YANKEE thing to say--- Of course, no one ever said Georgians could SPELL.... YANKEES come to the south to visit, do their obnoxious yankee thing, and go home. DAMN YANKEES are the ones who come down here and STAY! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! You might be a redneck if you've ever used lard as a sexual aid... Thorne, Tennessee Redneck Faerie and damn proud of it

"I posted it where I wanted to because, honestly, I prefer to offer something other than the US vs THEM bullshit that has been plaguing both forums." It's my ball, we'll play by my rules? For the record, neither of my posts were to "defend" Jack. They were both basically warnings. (Although one can make the point that warning someone of a danger is "defending" them). First, about the posibility of hacked accounts (very real, by the way, have a look at the nasty "hackers" thread in the "complaint" forum). Second warning, about the need for an administrator to be above board, to make sure the rules are fair, and to lead by example, following those rules. The quality of a leader is that they never say "do as I say, not as I do". I don't particularly care what kind of jokes Jack makes over in the "Tavern". But the rule (Jack's rule) is that they don't belong in the "Forum News and Team Contacts". If anyone else had done that, the thread would have been moved. Instead, we get "I posted it where I wanted to". I know, it's Jack's house, and he can post it wherever he wants it. I don't need my nose rubbed in it. There is a heck of a difference between trying to humerously diffuse a thread that is getting too hot, and what Jack has done. Ciao! Joe

Sorry, Joe, but I've NEVER heard any rule that says you can't make a joke in the news forum. Hell, I do it all the time!

Hey hey hey...I was born in Alabama and raised in Georgia and I know the Foxworthy family!! Oh and I went to school in T-E-N-N-E-S-S-E-E ;) Maybe Im a Metal Head from Georgia! Now thats a scary combo! Redneck metal head... yikes! Clint ;)

oh sorry calendil- it was beelzebulb that said that! - Well, okay beelzebulb is from the north alright, but I don't guess we could call Canadians "Yankees" in all fair(y)ness. We'll just save those digs for Michiganers. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Hmmm.... come to think of it, Beelzebulb WAS saying something about Tennesseeans... Okay, then Beelzebulb IS a yankee after all- just another yankee driver to look out for on I-75... Which is also the way yankees get to Atlanta Clint! Sorry, I've just never forgiven Sherman for what he did to that fair city... By the same token I've never forgiven Andrew Jackson for what he did to the Cherokee nation either, and he was a Tennesseean! They make him out to be some kind of hero here in Nashville- he's as bad as Hitler as far as I'm concerned. The moral of the story is, there are good people and bad people wherever you go. (Just happens that more of the bad ones are yankees, that's all!) In all fun and levity, Thorne =};-}>

Joe, I allow people to express themselves, if you look on a few threads down, I believe it was Warrior_DL, posted a joke to try and ease the tension. I didn't smack him in the head and tell him to do it in the tavern, I might have even responded to it. As for fairness, I am very fair. I don't really see where you think that I act like God and tell people my way or the highway. I think allot of people will attest to the fact that I am fair and sometimes too nice for my own good. I don't break balls here. That's why I have a Legume to keep my backbone straight :o) I let people express themselves. I am not some almighty ruler who say is final. I have 12 guys (no I don't think I am Jesus) who I get their opinion before I do anything, such as deleting a post or come down on someone. If anything, the atmosphere here in this place is pretty relaxed. I am sorry that you don't see that. Yes, the possiblity of hacked accounts are being looked into. Though why anyone would want to be me for a day is beyond me and that person should really have their head examined... HELL, I WOULD PAY SOMEONE TO BE ME FOR A DAY :o) Bottom line: Relax, sit back, take a deep breath. If you have a problem with me, tell me what it is. If you don't want to tell me and prefer to have a problem with me, then perhaps this isn't the place for you and you may find yourself comfortable somewhere else more to your liking. Jack

Jack, Perhaps we both need to take a deep breath. ;-) I think you're reading way too much into this, or I'm not expressing myself clearly (which has been known to happen). If I had a problem with you, I would already be gone, or organizing a rebellion. I'm neither ;-) Anything I've said was meant as advice. Friendly advice. If I hurt your feelings with the "effect your sense of humor" comment, I am sorry. I love word plays, and that accidental one struck me as much funnier than your original joke. My tolerance for ethnic jokes is very low, having had so many Polish jokes thrown at me in the past. Ciao! Joe

I'ts okay Joe, I too apologize it has been a pretty stressful week, thank god it has ended. Too bad all conflicts couldn't end on a good note like this huh? :o) Jack

Group Hug!!!!

No comment - just sneaking in on the Group Hug! This (Mid-Western) Yankee just wants to stay warm!

Tell me about it. I just got back from two days in Pliladelphia. It was supposed to be one day in Philly, then a short flight to Ithaca, but Tuesday we couldn't get into New York, and we couldn't even get out of Philadelphia to go home. Back in Detroit!!!!! Joe