Saturday Night by beachzz
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Description
Saturday Night
A rainy, wet night, yet another one spent alone. She wandered from room to room, not easy in a house so small. A book read, music heard, tv on but not seen—the same routine on these endless lonely nights. The phone never rings, when it does, it’s never the voice she wants to hear. He won’t call anyway; he’s too busy with his life, his world. She’s past that, it doesn’t hurt anymore; he’s become less than an itch scratched and forgotten. It just left a hole, one that’s not filled easily. Sure, she could go out, to some bar, to be one of the many women just waiting for her prince charming to ride up and take her away. In those bars, there’s an endless line of men standing with beers in their hands, making a strange sort of ritual circle around the dance floor. They barely move to the music, while the women dance alone, wild and wonderful. So, no, she doesn’t go there, for she knows that the white horse is nothing but an ass in disguise.
And she wanders, and wonders.
9/18/10
Comments (11)
myrrhluz
This is beautifully written and struck a few familiar chords. Chords that are played when I hear the Joni Mitchell song (The Last Time I Saw Richard) "All romantics meet the same fate someday. Cynical and drunk, and boring someone in some dark cafe." Sometimes you have to ignore the asses and dance among the trees, or along the beach. Though if you don't live in an unreasonably hot place like San Antonio, it's better to wait until the rain passes. Excellent image to go with your words.
auntietk
A nicely moody piece ... well done! The prince doesn't come by until you're past the point of looking, btw. One of life's weird little jokes.
durleybeachbum
So well put, Marilyn! Interesting what Tara says!
lizzibell
Very nice...
anahata.c
Your image is mysterious and beautiful, as your writers gallery images always are (you sometimes show your "2D" side in what you do with these writers images). But of course the short rumination is the center. And I'd think that anyone who's been through the end of a relationship and the seeking of a new one would relate to this, however different each person's perspective is. Stated with your usual succinctness, picking a few specifics that fill the bill, and expressing the emotions point blank and in a word or two, it's a real Marilyn piece. And everyone should be able to relate to it from one or another time in their life. And re Tara's thought (one of life's weird little jokes, lol), yes it can be very true for some, but then not true for others. We all have our own paths, and who knows when connections come or are discovered. Very well written. I'm only here for one image per, this morning, so I chose your writing for a change: But that's not because your other work isn't worth just as much attention! I just decided to sit with your words for a change. (You already know how much I love your images!)
flavia49
wonderful work!
goodoleboy
Pathos is definitely your forte, Marilyn. And the blue mushroom cloud effect adds much to the feeling. Kind of reminds me of Frankie and Johnny. That, and an accompanying saxaphone, sounds like a perfect setting for a Cyd Charisse dance routine.
Chipka
This is an incredibly evocative piece of writing; and it's an experience I'm quite familiar with--especially the guys standing around a dance floor with beer in hand and NO dancing taking place. They're usually looking for someone who thinks they're knights in shining armor, but the problem with that is knights in shining armor are untested! Gimme a knight in dented, tarnished armor with battle marks on it any day! He's been tested in combat and he's survived and he's pretty good at killing the bad guys. :-) As for the poem itself, it's mood incarnate (hmmm...can words actually be incarnate...? WEll, no, but yeah if that makes sense.) You capture so much in so few words and it's all pure emotion without any stuff that encumbers pure emotion. It's raw awareness, far beyond anything weepy, giggly, or otherwise superfluous. In short it's clean and is quite a kicker. Great stuff and I love the image. I can almost make it out but not quite. It fits the poem to a tee and lets the viewer/reader impose their own emotional image. Yeah...this rocks.
TallPockets
LIFE is not about surviving the storm, but DANCING in the RAIN.
danapommet
Special image with the blue colors, ocean waves and ghostly face. Your narrative paints a powerful image of its own. I'll bet that many have faced a dark time in their lives. Dana
LovelyPoetess
Bravo! So succintly written, creates quite the mood, which is only enhanced by your visual image. : )