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THE PLACE FOR ALL THINGS BRYCE - GOT A PROBLEM? YOU'VE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE

Subject: OT - Just a little explaination of how life works........

TheBryster opened this issue on Feb 07, 2013 · 8 posts
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TheBryster ( ) posted Thu, 07 February 2013 at 10:11 AM · edited Mon, 25 November 2024 at 3:01 AM
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Content Advisory! This message contains profanity

I got this in my mail today :

         Mathematics:
        This comes from 2 maths teachers with a combined total of 70 yrs. Experience.
        It has an indisputable mathematical logic.
        It also made me Laugh Out Loud.
        This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint..
        it goes like this:

        What Makes 100%?

        What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?

        Ever wonder about those people who say they
        are giving more than 100%?  We have all been
        to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%.

        How about achieving 103%?

        What makes up 100% in life?

        Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

        If:
        A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

        Is represented as:
        1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19
        20 21 22 23 24 25 26

        Then:

        H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
        8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

        And

        K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
        11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 =96%

        But,

        A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
        1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

        And,

        B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
        2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

        AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

        A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
        1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 =118%

        So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty, that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, its the Bullshit and Ass Kissing that will put you over the top.
        Now you know why some people are where they are!

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster


And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...

Ravyns ( ) posted Thu, 07 February 2013 at 10:15 AM

LOL.. I've got to send this one to my daughter.  She'll apreciate it since she just encountered one of the 103% people at work yesterday.. LOL

**************************************************************************************

Life may not be the party we hoped for but while we're here we should dance.

 

tjohn ( ) posted Thu, 07 February 2013 at 1:28 PM

Yoink! Stolen for some fun posting of my own. Thanks for the giggles!

This is not my "second childhood". I'm not finished with the first one yet.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

"I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather....not screaming in terror like the passengers on his bus." - Jack Handy

bobbystahr ( ) posted Thu, 07 February 2013 at 6:35 PM

Thanks Chris...I knew some one some where had sussed this one out....

 

Once in a while I look around,
I see a sound
and try to write it down
Sometimes they come out very soft
Tinkling light sound
The Sun comes up again



 

 

 

 

 

Quest ( ) posted Fri, 08 February 2013 at 5:30 PM

LOL...I'm pushing this forward to some friends who I know will appreciate it. This from an underachiever...or is that 103% statement? (He...he)

 

 

 

BecSchm ( ) posted Fri, 08 February 2013 at 6:39 PM

That is priceless!  Thanks for the LOL moment!

dyret ( ) posted Sat, 09 February 2013 at 1:45 PM

Thanks! Finaly mathematics makes sense to me :-)

Rayraz ( ) posted Fri, 15 March 2013 at 4:36 PM

hahaha you wouldn't believe how many times I've been asked to give 110%, 120% even 200%...

It doesn't matter how many times you make the impossible happen or save someone's ass. Even if you could give 110%, people would downgrade the same result to 90% the next time you've got to do the same thing.

In other words, when you're at work, any results of your labour will only be rated excellent once. After that, they become the expected result.

(_/)
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(")(")This is Bunny. Copy and paste bunny into your signature to help him gain world domination.

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