"As the holiday season truly begins, let us all be truely thankful for what we have..."

Let us celebrate the lives of those whom we love - and strive to be more loving towards everyone else...

Let's take this time to relax...To contemplate...and to recouperate a little from the trials and tribulations of everyday life...

When giving gifts - let's remember that "It's the thought that counts"...So it's safe to say that novelty items such as "Padro The Animatronic Talking Penis" might not go over so well with Grandma - unless she's a retired stripper, or an old pervo !

When hugging people - sometimes it's "ok" to squeeze their butt cheeks - provided that good first aid materials are readily available, should they get pissed and force feed you a broken chair leg...

My cousin Bob doesn't appreciate that too much...

Remember that setting fire to someone else's Christmas tree deliberately - does NOT constitute, under legal, terms a "holiday lighting"...

DO NOT call ANYONE of another religion an infidel over the holiday season - it's people who come over to your house and taint up your bathroom by leaving foul odors and sprinkling your toilet seat with used beer who are the freaking infidels!

Rememder that Christmas lighting is ONLY FOR FREAKING CHRISTMAS!!! Stop keeping that crap up all year long unless your planning on turning your house into either a salloon, or a make shift heliport...

Limit the amount of holiday lighting that you put on your homes - as causing blindness and madness is not "Spreading good cheer"...

Thank you - and happy holidays you evil turds...

I've see po' folk use christmas lighting indoors all year round because it's light enough to see by (barely), and it keeps the light bill down..;)

well grandma is getting "Padro The Animatronic Talking Penis" regardless of what you say, so there!!

PAKLED - there are low cost alternatives to christmas lighting for po folks to see by - these are just rednecks (not that that's a BAD thing)...

If it weren't for rednecks, we wouldn't have NASCAR, mullets, skanky ass beer, or pickled eggs and pig's feet (YUUUMMMM).

Rednecks have made a lot of valid important contributions to our society. The guy that invented the T.V. remote was probably a redneck - or the "chip clip" to keep your "tator" chips fresh was likely a redneck, or hey - how about Cambell's Soup soup can's with pull tabs? You can't tell me that THAT one didn't come from a bubba! 

Not to mention recliners and tail gate parties. The world would be a pretty dull place without rednecks - I mean , after all - can YOU imagine a world without Billy Ray Cyrus, Anna Nicole Smith, or Cheeze Whiz???!!!

As for you donniemc0 - just make sure you don't buy a "used" Padro, as the prospects of making that mistake are truly horrifieing. By the way - THANKS FOR THE DISTURBING VISUAL!!!