There is this girl I really liked for a while but it turns out she likes my best friend. Of course now he's living it up and I'm mad at him but he's still my best friend. To top it off she likes him for qualities he truthfully does not posess. Sorry for posting this but no ones home around here and I needed to let something out.

Max, in time she will see that he doesn't possess those, and if you are there to support them both through the fling, while still showing her that you care for her, without being overbearing, she will come to see that clearly, and things will right themselves again.... grins hugssssssss JenC

I gotta say, I agree with JC on this one...very well said. I've been through those battles before, and although I was never lucky enough to get the girl in the end, it was still a worthwhile experience to go through (believe it or not) and definitely taught me some things for the future. Now that I look back at most of those interests, I'm glad they turned out the way they did in some ways...of course, there are times I wish otherwise too. MD

Things always work out the way they are supposed to. Be a friend and a gentleman. This is one of those little tests that life throws at you. Prove that you have the character to move forward gracefully and with dignity and everyone will benefit.

Last time I went through such a thing was when I had a room mate who was the drummer in my band. I worked with a girl I was crazy about and we started dating. I brought her home, he was there, they started talking, violins started playing, and I could see the writing on the wall! It took all my resolve to "let it go" because we had been gigging and working on original tunes for 6 months.

Next thing I knew, he moved in with her, the band broke up, and I still had to see her at work. She showed up at work with strange bruises, and once with a black eye. She confessed that he beat her, and I urged her to leave him. But she stayed with him and I got tired of the emotional "ping-pong". I got tired of L.A. too and moved back to my hometown.

Three years later I got a call from some L.A.P.D detectives who wanted to question me about my ex-roommate/bandmate. I spent several days being 'interviewed, and they filled boxes of legal pads. I even went back to L.A. on their "nickel" and got to ride around with detectives for several days in Hollyweird as I pointed out his old haunts.To wrap this up--Brandon, my roommate, was suspected in as many as 31 MURDERS, and they were able to convict him on only five of them. But he is in prison for life-no parole. Now I ask you,did she pick the wrong guy, or what?

wow. Thanks for all the advice! things are already looking up!

Glad I could help max. That's just one of my many "Roommates from Hell" stories! :-)

Read and learn

http://intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html

you were just on the wrong ladder.

madmax,one door shuts and another better one opens.real love ambushes us when we least expect it.Well it did for me anyway.

Cheers
GG.

Danamo: WOW! Is that creepy or what?

Jen spoke the truth. This girl will need you to be there for her when she does finally sees through your mates disguise and the support you give her will speak volumes. 8) Catlin

That sucks. But you'll have to live with it. As Jen and the others already said. You'll have to be a friend and a gentleman. She can't help liking him at the moment just like you can't help it that you like her. If you're friend is really not the guy she thinks he is there's a reasonably big chance things won't work out between them. If you stay friendly through the whole thing that'll only improve your chances. I've been in a similar situation once, there where two girls I was normal friends with and both started to really like me a lot. Problem was that they where best friends. They apparently had a big fight about it. I wasn't in love with either of them, so I decided not to date either of them. Just to make sure not to make the problems bigger. And then ofcourse my dreamgirl also has a boyfriend. Luckily I don't know who. I feel with you.

well..I guess my drummer's not so crazy after all..;) dang. The two words that have stood me best with women is 'pay attention'..it will get you through a lot of faults that otherwise might get noticed..;) And, though it's probably a different outlook, there's other women out there..just hang in there..maybe she has a friend..who knows?

Danamo...that's probably the most amazing story I've heard in months. Man, glad you got away safely! What ever happened to the girl? MD

Sounds like the roomate proved the 'what goes around comes around' saying. That ladder theory made me chuckle.

chuckle? That my friend is Man Gospel!

Thanks Ian, I lost track of the lady in question several years ago, though I've done occasional computer searches to see if I could locate her and see what's become of her.

lol@ Vile. I do agree there is a lot of truth to the ladder theory. There is a syndicated talk-show host named Tom Leykus who expouses much the same viewpoint and theory.

If that is also your opinion of women Vile then you are a bit sad.....................

I agree catlin. I got through the first three pages and quit in disgust. Sounds like something off of Howard Stern, possibly the most disgusting man ever.

lol, on that ladder theory. It does have some truth in it, especially about the alcohol lowering ones standards. Thats why I drink alone, can't wake up with any mistakes laying next to me :P I always joked that if I married a second time it would be for money. Wow Danamo, glad your lady friend wasn't one of his victims. Another thing I have to worry about if I ever date again, it seems a lot of the creeps are smooth talkers. Madmax, best advice is whats already been said here. Vile, I remember 5 yrs ago when my husband first started having doubts about his love for me. I was in a class full of young men, I just shied away from talking to any of them because I knew the only reason they would be interested in me would be for sex. So sad and lonely to realize this but thats human nature. And yes, I'll admit to having a friend's only list in addition to the other list. But lots of laughs when I read about the part where he mentioned physics. It was a physics class I was in with all those guys. Ang

My theory? Make 'em laugh! Works every time! Which begs the question, how many girlfriends/boyfriends have you lot had? That doesn't necessarily mean 'sexual partners'........just serious/semi-serious relationships..

catlin_mc funny you should say that. I believe women rule the earth (they just don't know it). And I mean that literally! Women have always decided the fate of the human race. The ladder Theory (and it is a theory as it is vague about putting it in practice), is only to help the male of your species be aware of only about .001% of what a womens thought process is. More women should direct men to this site to save some leaps of Death and broken hearts!

lol...................8D

what is it called if a woman wants a man to be her friend AND occaisional sex buddy? NO strings attached? The theory didn't hit on that point.

Friends With Benefits. MD

Under the section Manifestations of the Ladder Friends with Benifits as our well read MadDog31 stated.

I was always hoping for that one chance to do the ol' friends w/ benefits...never came around. I was always such a great friend that they never even thought of romantic things with me. :( MD

LOL, I'm hoping to get a guy that just wants to be a friend with benefits. I've done a 20 yr sentence, I'm happy being free at the moment, I just sometimes miss the (ya know) stuff. But I don't want to get involved with a relationship. sigh I'll just go back to doing my bryce right now.

Ang: Whose this guy Bryce you're doing? I'm jealous....;-)

:-D

The trouble with relationships Ang is that they appear out of nowhere when you least expect. I was at a point of "I hate men" when I met my current partner and we've been together 3 years now. I think when you're really not looking that's when cupid is most likely to strike. 8) Catlin

Should have added...............so beware. lol 8)

Catlin:.........and then The Bryster turned up and everything got a bit blurred..............

LOL..........................8D