Seems someone has been having a bit of a joke at my - and possibly your - expense recently.

Claire and I went to stay with family for a couple of days over the Bank Holiday and I asked a "friend" to look after the place and feed our cats.

The good news is, the cats are just fine and the house is still in one piece.  My guitars appear to be intact, too.  So far, so good...

I found out - today - said "friend" has been making waves on a few forums, including this one, sending a few emails and generally larking about.  No, I'm not happy, particularly not happy because I had a call from my father, who was less than pleased with an email he received.  Had he opened the email yesterday, I would have known then.  As it is, I haven't had time to check my own mails or go online at all until now.

Anyhow, "friend" is now "ex-friend" with a black eye.  Yes, really.  I'm not usually one to resort to fisticuffs but I'm very, very pissed off.  Particularly so that he broke the news about Claire's pregnancy.  That was the final straw.

If you received a PM, email or other communication from "me" from Saturday onwards, ignore and/or delete it.  I've changed my password and I'm not letting anyone other than Clare and I use this computer ever again.

 As for "friend", if you're in Rotherham and you see a 30 something guy with a black eye, it's probably David Lawson.  Feel free to kick, punch, call names and throw rotten fruit.

I may be an asshole but I don't act like one here, not ever.

 Oh, no :(

If you want, I can delete the other thread...

what an arsehole!  Sounds to me like he got off lightly with the black eye

Sorry for these troubles... I could not quite believe that what I was reading really came from the SamTherapy I thought I knew just a little - or at least, not you in your right mind. You may wish to ask the mods to delete that thread, or at least those posts, if possible.

Ok, who's going to tell us how to secure our systems when we have kitty-sitters in? I mean, short of pulling the HD out. If I remember correctly, setting a password on the system is very easy to get around.

I'm sorry it happened to you, but it does bring up a good question. And the black eye is completely in line with his behavior.

I'm confused!  So is this the Real Sam Therapy and the other one the ex-friend, or is this perhaps the ex-friend, and the other one the REAL Sam Therapy?  Would the REAL Sam Therapy please stand up!
dph
PS: Not to be mean, but just how is it that you're not in jail after giving him a black eye.  In Israel, you'd at least be spending a night behind bars, and contemplating a day in court, and possibly prison on assault charges.  And no, justification and provocation would not be considered a defense.

So let me get this straight. The guy who said that "he wasn't an artist and that anyone who said they were were being pretentious" was your ex friend or was that you?

Some friend!  This one you are better off without.  And at thirty something, acting like an adolescent.  Sheesh.

Quote -  Oh, no :(

If you want, I can delete the other thread...

Jen

I'd be very pleased if you can remove it, or any offending posts made by "me".  They'd be from sometime Saturday (BST) to the post I made above.  Dunno if it included IMs but I can see my Site mail flashing new posts.  I'm almost frightened to open it.  

@ Lost in Spaceman -

I'd never say anything like that to anyone, ever.  Oh, Christ.

And the hits keep on coming...

Had to go quickly earlier, after my post above.   Had a visit from the Dibble.  I have to report to the police station at 10:30, "regarding an allegation of assault, occasioning actual bodily harm".

Didn't help myself much when I told the law what I thought of them.  There were a few short words beginning with "f" and "c" in that exchange.   

@ David, gee thanks for your help, mate.

I'll take the piss, sure, but not to the extent of insulting anyone here.  I've always been a good guy - at least, I think so - even as a moderator.  Wouldn't stand any nonsense, sure, but to the best of my knowledge I have a good reputation and I don't want it tarnished. 

Quote - Ok, who's going to tell us how to secure our systems when we have kitty-sitters in? I mean, short of pulling the HD out. If I remember correctly, setting a password on the system is very easy to get around.

I'm sorry it happened to you, but it does bring up a good question. And the black eye is completely in line with his behavior.

From now on, my browser is set to "Delete all cookies on exit".  Claire knows all my passwords - so does my father - so in a real emergency, the people I can really trust will be able to get in.

May be a little paranoid but I'm considering passwording the whole system with TrueCrypt.

I read a few posts that didn't quite sound like you. But I wasn't sure. Can say that I had an odd feeling because the tone seemed different. I am so sorry that this ex-friend would do such a thing!!!!

Quote - @ David, gee thanks for your help, mate.

I'll take the piss, sure, but not to the extent of insulting anyone here.  I've always been a good guy - at least, I think so - even as a moderator.  Wouldn't stand any nonsense, sure, but to the best of my knowledge I have a good reputation and I don't want it tarnished. 

Sorry Sam, but I speak from personal experience!  Been there, done that, lived to very much regret it!
dph

 Ok, I think I've deleted them all, and moved the thread to Mt. Doom.  If not, let me know :)

Thanx, Jen.

Meanwhile, an open message to anyone who believes I offended them:

I'm really sorry I wasn't more careful with my computer or my choice of friends.  You all have permission to kick my virtual butt. 

 I think it's time to remember Internet Rule #20: 

Nothing is to be taken seriously ;)

Quote -  I think it's time to remember Internet Rule #20: 

Nothing is to be taken seriously ;)

If only. :)

Look at my signature, how's that for ironic?  

 ( I failed Latin, man...)

Sucks to hear about your situation.

About the law getting involved-

You should probably file an identity theft report with the cops as it pertains to the troublemaker.  After all, if he's gonna go after you for assault-and-battery, then you should return the favor for his defiling your online identity the way he did.  Quid pro quo, I always say.  

And make sure homeboy didn't do anything else while masquerading as you... like ordering up a buttload of monkey porn on Amazon.com or something. 

It's "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke". 

Never my intention to annoy and/or insult anyone here and I take full responsibility.  I should be a damn sight more careful with my computers and who gets near them.

Wish me luck for tomorrow morning.  I've a good mind to turn up drunk.  :)

Quote - Sucks to hear about your situation.

About the law getting involved-

You should probably file an identity theft report with the cops as it pertains to the troublemaker.  After all, if he's gonna go after you for assault-and-battery, then you should return the favor for his defiling your online identity the way he did.  Quid pro quo, I always say.  

And make sure homeboy didn't do anything else while masquerading as you... like ordering up a buttload of monkey porn on Amazon.com or something. 

Unfortunately, the charge would stand anyhow, since retaliation isn't justification.  

Identity theft - well, that's difficult to make a case for, since he didn't hack or actually steal anything.  The law is a bit weird here about that sort of thing. It's all down to "necessary precaution", which I (obviously) didnt' take.  

That said, if I do find a heap of monkey porn - or any equivalent thereof - tons of bricks will be dropped from great heights, since I have around 12 witnesses to say where I actually was at the time.  

TBH, I'm not it the least bit worried; I'm viewing it as another opportunity to voice my opinion of South Yorkshire's Finest.  

Posting this here because I want it as (possible) evidence if faeces hit air conditioning tomorrow (well, later today, actually)...

Jen - will I be able to obtain copies of the offending posts, with date stamps, if necessary?  Claire (who is really not happy about me giving David a slap) just got off the phone with a friend, who gave me some advice.

Quote - Ok, who's going to tell us how to secure our systems when we have kitty-sitters in? I mean, short of pulling the HD out. If I remember correctly, setting a password on the system is very easy to get around.

Setting a user password, an Administrator password and setting the BIOS to allow the machine to boot only from the hard drive should prevent most casual attempts to access the machine.  Disabling WAN access in your router while you are away can prevent Internet access as well (provided they don't bypass the router)

Sam,

If you need Character witnessess, I'm sure that many from the Forum could testify that you are indeed quite a character.

Good luck tomorrow!

@ Wand - yeah, I'm sure.  

No worries; as I said, I expect a fine at worst.  

In truth, they should give me an award from public funds, or something like that.  But that won't happen, since Police tend to take exception to being called names that begin with  "Stupid mother" and end with "fuckers", nor do they take too kindly to being called very short anglo saxon words which were once the correct term for the female reproductive tract.  Especially since one of the nice officers in question and I have had frank exchanges of opinions in the past.  And I was equally complementary back then.

I really do not like the Dibble and this bunch of idiots aren't helping their cause.  

Quote - Posting this here because I want it as (possible) evidence if faeces hit air conditioning tomorrow (well, later today, actually)...

Jen - will I be able to obtain copies of the offending posts, with date stamps, if necessary?  Claire (who is really not happy about me giving David a slap) just got off the phone with a friend, who gave me some advice.

If you need them for legal issues, I can't see why you can't get copies from admin ;)

Thank you.  I doubt I will, but I want to cover all bases.  The buddy who was on the phone to Claire - who was very unhappy about the situation is hyper paranoid about anything relating to South Yorkshire Police.  I don't blame him; between us, we have a hell of a story to tell.

I may just IM you with the details. It should give you a laugh, if nothing else.

Right, time for a couple hours sleep - if I'm not too hacked off by everything - before I answer to the Dibble.  If you don't hear from me for quite a while, count yourselves very lucky, er, I mean to say, they probably locked me up.  

No escape, though; I imagine Claire is gonna kick me arse for being so dumb in the first place.

Goodnight all, and thanks for your kindness and understanding.

Sorry to hear about this.  In the future, it might be a good idea to put a password on your computer before you let anyone do some house sitting. 

Next time get a gay house sitter. All he'll do is redecorate! LOL! :tt2:

Back from my visit to the Police station...

Spent a couple of hours in a cell before a legal representative could get to see me.  I discussed the matter with him, we agreed I would admit to the assault and be very contrite about it.

The interview was fairly straightforward and I didn't lose my temper this time.  I just told them what I did and why I did it.  

I had to wait another hour in a cell while the case was referred to a senior officer, who liaises with the CPS, in order to decide whether to take the case to court.

One good result - they decided it wasn't serious enough and gave me a caution.

Dear Sam;
Congratulations on the resolution of your difficulty!  You were lucky, very very lucky!  In Israel, you'd have been in a cell for at least 24 hours, and no lawyer would come to see you, unless there was one hired by your family.  Again, I tell you, I speak from very bitter personal experience.
Be well, be happy that it all ended the as simply as it did.  And again, Mazel Tov on your expected child.
Yours truly,
David P. Hoadley

Thanks, David.  Our legal system, while flawed, is not too bad in some ways.  

I now have to be a good boy for at least a year or this incident can come back to bite me.  If I'm hauled up on another assault charge any time soon, this would be added to the list, mentioned in court and I'd be "sentenced appropriately".

I was also given a stern talking to regarding my choice of language when I was visited by the law but I was advised to apologize for it, stating it was said in the heat of the moment.  Apology sort of accepted - hence the stern talking to and a strong warning - so things could have been worse.

Dear Sam;
After 56 years of compounded stupidity, there is ONE thing that I've learned in life: Profanity is like a very strong condiment!  It's best, and most effective, when used very sparingly!
I find nowadays, that euphemisms are more effective than swear words.
dph

Wow.  I trust who will be in my house while I'm on vacation next week but just the same,  I think I'll make sure I'm logged off of everything and hide the power cord to my computer.  Just in case. 

Glad it seems to have worked out for you Sam. It's a shame that defending your reputation isn't a defense against character assasination.

Now I'm a little calmer, I don't think it was an attempt at character assassination, more of a stupid prank that went too far.  Dave has a rep for larking about - as do I - but I know when to stop.

I'm still really, really hacked off about it but things aren't so bad, apart from a few ruffled feathers.  No real damage done and most of the posts seem to be here.  I got a lecture from my dad, too.  That was about being too trusting, though.  He thought it was funny that I gave Dave a slap. 

Glad you avoided gaol-I was afraid they might discover that you have been posting under an alias. 

It just occurred to me-do you have a DAZ account?  If you have your CC number stored there, Heaven knows what you might have bought over the last while!! :scared:

I do have a DAZ account but the security requires me to login whenever I access my purchase details - including buying new stuff.  Still, I'll check it out just to be safe. 

Question: What exactly is Monkey Porn, and how does it differ from regular porn?
I keep coming across in these forums various references to this odd type of porn, and yet I've never seen any samples of it.  I've yet to see a porn pic involving monkeys, or even Monkees.
dph

Sheesh - I thought your "alter ego" spoke a lot of sense, and nearly pm'd him/you to say so over the weekend ....:)  Mind you, I was pissed (English pissed, not American pissed) in Hull, East Yorkshire at the time, though but.  And I used to work for S Yorks' finest......:) :)

What a nightmare.  Have a beer.

 Oh phew! I was starting to think I'd totally misjudged you. I'd always taken you for a nice guy and suddenly you were sprouting this drap? It did seem out of character for you as I thought I knew you, but.. sadly I never considered that "you" weren't you. I did wonder if you were smoking something or was drunk or whatever. But not that it was an imposter posting.

Once I was catsitting at a neighbours house, I noticed he'd placed a very elaborate puzzle made out of little paper bits on his keyboard. Of course so that he could see if anyone had used it. I considered "sneezing" at them G I guess I'm glad I didn't.

My computer is password protected all the time, it's an old habit. My kids and hubby knows the password of course (as I know theirs) but I've never even considered the possibility of a neighbour using my computer while feeding the cats. Next time we're on a vacation I'll make sure to encrypt it even further!

 Glad to hear it worked out all right for you! I wondered what was going on- I have NEVER seen you post anything remotely like that before.

  Cheers!

I'm just glad I didn't respond to the imposter with just what I thought of his "Lark" as it was in the heat of the moment and likely would have tickled him to no end.

A little more fall out from the incident but hopefully nothing too serious.  The guy was also exchanging IMs with another member here.  Fortunately, he seemed to behave himself there.  

Which begs the question, why would someone behave like a knob in public but be fairly reasonable in private?

@ TG - I'm not even like that when I'm drunk.  I tend to be a silly, happy drunk.  I have always tried to be a good guy here so it really gets my goat when I have my rep tarnished.  I'd like to bet there are some people here who won't even talk to me, or read my posts, because they think Dave really was me.

All of which makes me think, Dave knows a lot more about me than I thought.  He sure has absorbed a lot about my likes and dislikes - pertaining to other vendors and products, that is - than I realized.  He also knows a lot of my stock phrases, "pixel monkey" being one of 'em.

AFAIK, he doesn't have an account of his own here (he's a programmer) so I guess we should be thankful for small mercies.
 

Who the  bloody hell gives a stuff about you ?

I hope your friend sues the arse off you.

I thought this was a Poser Forum not some personal blog about
some unknown idiot called "Sam Therapy."

Go away and cry to mommy.

Quote - Who the  bloody hell gives a stuff about you ?

I hope your friend sues the arse off you.

I thought this was a Poser Forum not some personal blog about
some unknown idiot called "Sam Therapy."

Go away and cry to mommy.

I for bloody one, bloody DO!
**@**SamTherapy, I always have, and always will, hold you in the highest respect.  We may disagree at times, but it is a disagreement between friends!  DO take care, and may G-d bless both you and yours!
David P. Hoadley

Quote - Who the  bloody hell gives a stuff about you ?

Kindly answer your own question first. ;)

Quote - Who the  bloody hell gives a stuff about you ?

I hope your friend sues the arse off you.

I thought this was a Poser Forum not some personal blog about
some unknown idiot called "Sam Therapy."

Go away and cry to mommy.

Anyone who's ever received his help cares. Anyone who's a friend here cares. Who gives a stuff about you sir?

Could coltrace be the infamous aforementioned Dave in disguise?
dph

Quote - Could coltrace be the infamous aforementioned Dave in disguise?
dph

Or could someone have hacked Coltrace's account? It's been a member here since 2000 but hasn't broken 50 posts. Obviously they don't recognise that Sam was staff in this forum for a while which is another reason why folks care.