Yes children....I am considering doing a BLOG!!!

I am also planning to actually have a gallery here - I cleaned out my old one, but I am considering putting the stuff back up - so - stay tuned...

HMMMMM - what shall I put in my blog...Should I make a daily diary?

NO! This would be a bad idea - since my life is too mundane (thank God) for entertaining reading...

I think that it shall probably be a record of my creative brainstorming and my ideas - as well as my observations on every day life, either way - it's gonna HAVE to be something special...

HEY - MAYBE I COULD INCLUDE A RECIPE SECTION - like my recipe for window cleaner casserole, or cotton panties flambe!!!

OR - a guide to more effective nose picking - improving your skills in mining bigger nose gremlins!

Who nose - er - knows...time, and motivation will tell...

seems like the sound Jello makes when you slam it into a wall - BLOG...

Maybe it's an abbreviation:

Big Lovely Old Gals? Hmmmmm - NAH...

Bi-Lingual Old Guys? Hmmmmm - NAAHH...

Big Loser On Google? Hmmmm - MAYBE!

Thanks for the warning,......................I shall take heed and act appropriately !

Bloviating Old Gasbags?

Could be danno - or it could mean "Been Lovin On Goats"! .....

" " " ((( shiiivvvveeeerrrrr ))) " " "

isn't that monkey typing Shakespeare?..;)

It's not a monkey,............it's an ape.

looks like I picked a bad week to quit smoking.

Smoking what?

.tobacco .. and a bad week to quit drinking....

drinking what? .... WAIT - this is getting redundant...

TIME TO DROP MY DRAWERS AND MOON THE WHOLE ROTTEN STINKIN MESS OF YA!!!!

beer  .. .. and a bad week to get my glasses fixed.

That's ok...BECAUSE EVEN THE BLIND CAN SEE MY GLORIOUS FLAT SAGGY SADDLEBAGS OF POCK MARKED - STRETCH MARK RIDDLED GLORY!!!

MWA HA HA HA HAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGAAA

BLOG. Bloody Load Of  Garbage.

The first week it is intense navel gazing. Your deepest, darkest secrets. Your view of the world. Etc. Posted hourly.

Second week it's family issues. The new kittens. And where you went on holiday. Posts about 3 times a day.

Third week we find out the curtains and carpet you want . One post a day.

Week four and we are getting, 'Nothing much happening.' Posted every two or three days.

Week Five.

I am not knocking BLOGS. But most people lose interest within a few weeks. Unless their blog is documenting an event, hobby, or is being used as a (proper) online diary, most don't last past the first flush of enthusiasm.

Good point...then again...I already ruled out the daily diary thing - HOWEVER...

Being that I'm delusionally psychotic with occasional bouts of reality detatchment (IN SHORT - I'M A FREAKIN GENUIS!) - I'm sure that I can create something suitably entertaining.

For example - I can post an occasional picture of myself - imagine if you will a bald , toothless, middle aged dude with clammy pale skin wearing fishnet stockings - a T-Shirt that says "One In The Oven", and a viking helmet - WOW, I'm such a darn trend setter!!!

Or - I can include useful info like where to get great deals on spear guns - or places where you can get weekly discounts on stuff like Cool Whip and rubber bands!

The skies the limit! (unless I have an out of body experience and God beats me at playing checkers again - MAN - THAT DUDE KNOWS CHECKERS - WHEW!)

Kind of like Golum in drag? 

I'm waiting for the two space guys to mistake a bull for the cow DIE-ERIE on the 'got milk ?' commercials.

looks like I picked a good week to quit drinking milk.

Actually I'm not a cross dresser - I'm just in search of supportive legwear that has really good ventalation...

The "One In The Oven" thing refers to my unborn twin "Alfredo" who lives in my large intestine and has the power to peer into the future, but can only predict mundane events...

The viking helmet prevents space aliens and government mind beamers from reading my thoughts and discovering my plans to corner the market on all beef kosher bologna - in order to fund my diabolical efforts at warping the minds of America's consumers by opening a chain of nude fat farms that I'm going to call "slim down or Sea World will push you back into the ocean"...

try Lieterhosen.

gotta watch that - they tend to get out and go for walks on their own then you get blamed for all of their deeds.  

Naw just open up a liposuction clinic. Idonthink you gonna get many Rabbis to bless your  bologna , though. especially if you're gonna do what I think you're gonna do with the excreted fat.

BTW:

Idonthink no Viking hat will help you - the aliens discovered how to counteract the aluminum foil and hornyhat tricks about the same time we figured out how to shoot down their weather balloons way back in '47. That's why Reagan had to let all them mind controled guys out in the '80s. There were just too many of them and the budget for keeping them would have meant he couldn't play Dr. Strangelove with the Russians because we would have gone bankrupt first. So the consequence is that everything is four times as expensive as it should be and all those guys with horney hats are buying up everything in sight

.

• and a good week to quit eating balogna. 

@MUGSEY. If you want to stop aliens or the goverment from reading you mind, go on a reality tv show. After 6 years of watching such things I am yet to detect a contestant with a single thougth in their head. After a few weeks on one of these shows you will appear totally mindless in the eyes of aliens, goverment agencies and everyone elso not connected with the show.

Attached Link: http://news.aol.co.uk/article.adp?id=20060719133009990001

Dear Bryster...

I wouldn't be working for anybody who would fire me from my job over what I chose to write in my blog(s)...HOWEVER...I would take a huge steaming poop on their doorstep - and then write the words "A FACIST BASTARD LIVES HERE" in bright lime green spray paint on their garage door - or wherever such public advisements may be displayed!!!

Cyba Storm...

Reality T.V. is the culture death prattle of a waning civilization in decline - people who go on reality T.V. shows - and who demonstrate to the rest of humanity how damaged they really really are - may indeeed be shining examples of individuals that may very well be too stupid to live.I would rather lick a public toilet at a highway rest area than to be on a reality T.V. show.

BIKERMOUSE...

Lieterhosen arouses me - especially if worn by a sexy babe in clown makeup and sporting strategically placed balloon animals.

Also - you've gone into way too much detail in your response to the viking helmet thing - so I now have no other choice but to find a munchkin to bitch smack you across the knees with a large Polish Keobasa Sausage...

@Mugsey: Toilet seat licking. Another good choice for demonstrating, "MOVE ON. NO INTELLEGENT THOUGHTS HERE!!!"

So is abusing good Polish sausage.

Mugsy:

on T..V: Yeah sure - Everything you've written so far indicates that you'd jump at the chance to be on the Springer show.with a bevel of liposuction challenged babes with serious issues with bald guys.

About that hat thing - .

to the contrary I( don't think I've gone into enough detail about the guys in the horney hats.Used to was back in the good old days lotsa riders would wear them - this was beforst the Pete Wilson Mandatory helmet law here in the land of the free and home of the raiders. Yes even Pete Wilson was involved in Reagans plan to antenuate alien thoughts into formally freethinking Americans through the use of these horny hats. Yes lo to counter the wievel doings of Pete and Ron we had to purge ourselves of these mindless zombies because ride free isn't just a way of life it's also a slogan. Commonly these  poor slobs would be found wandering around a FOP lounge during their bingo games. Subsequently the HH guys would be  put in a place where noone could do them no harm -  until the outcry by the great R.R. who espoused 'let my people go - and give them back theit voting rites'. thus so armed a new group of voters was unleashed on the public who along with the disgruntled baseball fans subsequent to the great  baseball strike  a few years later  became the voting base who went on to form the republican revolution.

....

and it looks like I picked a good week to quit wearing horny hats ( I might make another one in Wings tonight after I write Dr. N  if I get drunk enough. Man I coulda gone another six weeks without thinking of the Mount Morrison Roof Pendant but then pelitic hornfels are like women - each one's differrent and at the same time they're all the same ! )

 Bryster, Ive had jobs that you could be fired (and worse) for discussing anything to do at work  - at all.
What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas so to speak.

Bikermouse - YOU ARE A GOD AMONG MEN!!! WOOOOW!!!

You wisdom has surely baked my noodle - as I really could manage to actually wrench some meaning out of that syntax storm! YES DAMMIT - I DO WANNA BE ON SPRINGER - YES, YES, A THOUSAND TIMES YES!!!

I wanna flash my man boobies and live vicariously through the misadventures of trailer park lesbians...

I wanna get a mullet and one of those collarless bright red long sleeve dress shirts that just screams "I CRUISE MY FAMILY REUNIONS FOR CHICKS!!!"

I wanna sit on a discount office chair in a cheap TV studio and get demoralized and emotionally devalued by a crack whore - while the rest of the TV audience around the world and a defrocked former Cincinatti mayor laugh at me for being enough of a yutz to even be there to begin with.

YES - I wanna sit there and be lectured to about morals and ethics by a slimy talk show host who has just exploited me shamelessly for over an hour so that he can get big fat checks and eat fish eggs and snails at a big vulgar rich people eatery - while contimplating doing things more vile than anything that I could EVER dream up.

YES - I want to be escorted under the the watchful eye of a "moron cam" - by a big bald moronic cop who works security part time to make payments on his pick up truck - while he ribbs me and covertly berates me for poops and giggles...

SOUNDS GOOD - WHERE DO I SIGN UP?!!!

CYBA-STORM:

First of all - I'll have you know that Einstein was a closet toilet seat licker, as was Gallileo, Kepernicus, Plato, and the guy that invented chip clips for snack bags...SO THERE LITTLE MISS POOPY PANTS - NYAAAAHHHH...

Secondly - only a limited mind would believe nievely that Polish Keobasa Sausage is only useful when eaten. People's lives have been saved by the more creative uses of even your average bun length wieners!!!

I haven't even talked about the thousand and one potentual uses for cream of mushroom soup or pork chops either!!!

@MUGSEY: WHAO back off. I tell you now, you say one thing bad about PORK CHOPS and this convesation is going to get nasty.

MISS POOPY PANTS I can take. Slight exageration, never more than a skid mark, but I will wear the comment.

Sausage, again prepared to bow to a greater authority.

But PORK CHOPS. NO WAY. Line in the sand. Cross it and no christmas present.

Here ya go

http://www.jerryspringertv.com/

you'll have to get past the flash macromedia stuff and all... according to the 'meta'  information from the google search engine, If you can wade through all the ads and stuff the information on how to get on the show is supposed to all be somewhere on the above linked site. 

I'd believe ther was something odd about Plato after reading 'the Phadrus'.

Einstein did indeed have some quirks. It is rumoured that he didn't use shaving cream - and you seldom see  pictures of him in his later years with his hair combed.

Galileo http://www-history.mcs.st-andrews.ac.uk/Biographies/Galileo.html.

if you are talking anout  his belief that the force acting on a body was the relative difference between its specific gravity and that of the substance through which it moved you might have something there.

however I believe you are quite wrong about  Copernicus

http://www-history.mcs.st-andrews.ac.uk/Biographies/Copernicus.html

Looks like I picked a bad week to read the "Teachings of Surak."

Wrong about Copernicus?...WRONG ABOUT COPERNICUS?!!!!...

HERESY!!!!...UN-ADULTERATED HERESY!!!!!!!

Cyba-Storm: I'm not picking on pork chops...SEND ME CHRISTMAS PRESENTS!!!

BIKERMOUSE...Yes...there are indeed type'O's - C-O-P-E-R-I-C-U-S...

I couldn't spell his name right - I should eat a bug...

No more cacophany references - BLEEECCCCKKKKKK - GAG - YUCK'O'RAMA!!!

BIKERMOUSE: Again - YES - I AM A MASOCHIST - I WANT TO BE ON SPRINGER (On his show that is - not actually ON HIM - I don't have very good fashion sense and some parts of my anatomy are "exit only" - so that would be barking up the wrong tree).

I also want to have anti - freeze poured directly into my eye sockets while listening to bastardised "Kenny G" Muzak tunes...

Hey I didn't correct your spelling.

"cacophany references" Are you talking about Galileo again?

Heresy ? what ever do you mean? Please explain - Only Mugsys can explain the actions of  Mugsys. Buzz whurr  Norman Coordinate. 

... but seriously in a quardillion words or less please explain ... how is defending the guy who said the Earth is fat heresy ? Saaaaaay!!! You don't work for the Vatican do you? You know they put up one of those Galileo devices in Arizona to prove to everyone once and again that the earth, far from being fat, is indeed so skinny  that at a distance it looks like a two dimensional object . . .  such a deal. 

Antifreeze huh? the Marmots just East of here like to get drink on that stuff. .. no accounting for taste. 

looks like I picked the wrong week to quit quoting Lloyd Bridges.

 notice the head holding device on the inside rim.

(drooling...) I WANNA TRY THAT THING ON MY KNOGGIN!!!!!!!

No - I simply said that saying that I'm wrong about anything - is heresy...

Also - I noticed that during my tyrate here I've made too many reference to "poop" and "poopy", and as a result - I've apparently gotten on my own nerves. The last thing in the world that I want to do is to develope a fecal fixation, although I am perfectly open to the notion of developing a fixation to either Crisco pan lard, women who studder, - or those really soft suede car buffing shammies that are somewhat reminiscent of a jungle loin cloth...

The points are the product of smoothing in Wings. The next time I'll add some depth to the hat so it doesn't look like that. also the bit where the horn connect to the helmet are a little of as I did not reshape the face that the horn edge face attaches to before bridging. the horns themselves were created using the bend tool in Wings. the next step after correcting noticable errors would be to add shaping and fur to the helmet. and texture/UV map it. (anyone could do it.)

yeah, I though i was wrong once but I was mistaken. 

OK I thought you were talking about sounds that clash like my neighobrs singing and just about any other noise on Earth.(the only  person in the world who can confuse a C natural  with an  A minor diminished 9th) 

looks like I picked the wrong week to quit  drinking coffee..

-TJ ( My favorite William Shatner quote is him as Danny Crane saying: "Clingons - did you say clingons?")

I drink coffee...I like to drink LOTS OF COFFEE...

Actually a clashing sound in my book is more like cutting a fart while watching reruns of "Rosanne"...

GOD - THAT WOMAN'S VOICE IS AN IRRITANT!!!

The viking helmut simply MUST be offered as a freebie - along with your soul and your first born child -

MWA HA HA HAAA HAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGA!!!!!!

Noooooooooooooooooooooo not the blog now this post  sounds like a made for tv movie good luck with the new blog.

Surely you jest:
I  might put the hat up on my site  once I get the bugs worked out, but the rest of that won't ever be on the table. 
If I were to put something like the horny hat up here as a free-bee the local Valkyries 'round cheer would be making me wear me greebles for a bow-tie.

deadman:
Yeah it has about as much plot as a TV movie . . . but If I think  it's much better written than most made for TV movies.

HERE'S THE STORY...

OF A MAN NAMED BRADY...

WHO WAS BUSY RAISING THREE BOYS - AND A DONE (What the Fu....? What's a DONE???)

THEY WERE FOUR MEN - LIVING ALL TO-GETHER...

YES THEY WERE ALL A-LONE...

Did you know that Florence Henderson actually dated her TV son Greg during the series run?

MRS. BRADY WAS AN INCESTUOUS SICKO SKAG!!! RALPHOOOO - GAG - BARF'O'RAMA!!!

Reality...Stranger than fiction!

Personally...I'de jump her bones to (THEN - NOT NOW...DEFINITELY - NOT - NOW!...)

( @ )( @ )       (   Y   )          (    T    )         <-Obscene Symbology...

 Demi Moore and Austin Cucher(sp) - Now that's sick. If she was gonna go for someone younger Tom Weller or that guy who plays Saed(sp) on Lost  would have been better choices. No accounting for taste . . .  I mean Demi Moore could have any man in the world ! 
Why Austin of all the rummys in all the gin joints in all the world ? 

MADNESS! utter MADNESS!!!

Demi Moore dating the "Dude Where's My Car" // "That 70's Show" guy!

That 70's Show was actually pretty accurate on a lot of the 70's retro - motiff stuff, I lived through the 1970's - I can vouch. Austin Cucher's character would have caught 99 kinds of hell socially however for being such a yutz, so I doubt that he would've found himself in such a cool click of losers - he would've instead probably have turned out to be a washed up glue sniffing loner...

Demi Moore - in my opinion - did her best stuff in "GI JANE". Quite a departure from the wooly leg warmer wearing teeny bopper characters she did back in the 80's. She went from a mediocre actress to one with actual talent. Her and Austin Cucher seems really screwy - especially after Bruce Willis. That's like trading in Whiskey for Kool Aid. She must have quite a range when it comes to dating practices - what's gonna come after Cucher - A cross dressing Boy George wanna be - or maybe an 18 year old idiot savant?

Maybe she'll switch gears and date a 90 year old War Vet whose seen more combat in his long life than Andrew Dice Clay at a N.O.W. rally. HEY - Maybe she might even kick the dude habit altogether and hook up with Chastity Bono?!

WHY TRY TO UNDERSTAND?!!! IT'S ALL A TRAGIC COMEDY OF ABSURDITIES!!!

Understand? Hey, I'm just jealous that she didn't pick me - of course I coulda said the same thing about Cher once. Rumor has it she was from Fresno.    

FRESNO?!!!

Trust me - your lucky the Cher thing didn't launch...

Just imagine you watching her vaccuum the rug in the nude singing "IF I COULD TURN BACK TIME" -

Shivers...cold - horrid shivers...BAD VISUAL!!!

I thought her riding that battleship gun while singing in that USO video left me with nightmares - oooooooooh - bad, bad, karma...

Yeah well I'm talking centuries ago like 1965 ( before Sonny Bono messed with her mind) she was quite the fox.

Well there's still Jolene Blalock  Accorduing to her bio over at startrek.com she likes photography, surfing, martial arts and a few other things I like to do too;  I have the feeling if she were introduced to motorcycles . . .  but she's married  . . . oh well maybe in the next life . . . besides how could you tell if an actress was faking ?

Speaking of Fresno , 10 days over 110. new record here;  we got the dregs of Phoenix's Monsoon this year  - When I was in Phoenix it got hotter than this and for longer but it was a dry heat. I guess it's a good thing CrazyDog got us all thinking about computers  and the  zen of art maintaince before the heat wave hit the northern climes. I guess as long as the electrons keep flowin and the rubber side stays down we'll be ok.

 so it's time to quote deadman87. On the other hand let's don't and pretend I did.

-Looks like I picked a bad week to quit paying my electric bill.

You can tell an actress is faking - when she rolls over and looks at you and says "DAMN - I LOST MY MOTIVATION!"...

I'm in OHIO - it's been in the upper 90's here but now it's cooled down significantly.

Ohio sucks...

We have seven months of frigid weather - a dead landscape - and dismal overcast skies. During the spring, early summer, and early autumn we have to worry about flash flooding and tornados. Every first wednesday of the month they test the tornado sirens here and it's like those old sci fi apocolypse flicks...

The culture here is rancid - red neck land where Rottwielers and pick - up trucks are freaking status symbols...

KILL ME!!!

Are you sure You don't live in Fresno? a litlre hotter than that here  - We don't usually get tornados touching down  but  we get several sitings a year and there  was a flash flood up at Huntington last week. As to pickups and rotweilers - Yep ! uhhuh ! yep ! ah yep!

White trash mullet head invasion - FILM AT ELEVEN!!!

I know a few red necks - whenever I tell them that I own PUGS instead of RABID FLESH EATING WAR HOUNDS - they wretch in disgust - as if I had told that I wear a pink ribbon tied around my winkie bob -

(I use to - but I stopped that - because every time I bent over to pick something up off of the floor - I blacked out - so now I just wear crotchless edibible thongs, my favorite is the "tropical apple mix" flavored ones - although I'm partial to strawberry. I tried wearing the chocolate ones once but they melted and the resulting "soak through incident" made everybody at work laugh at me and call me a "Tard"...).

In cousin bangin land - it's all about "STATUS and PRESTIGE (a.k.a. the country song "LET'S GET DRUNK AND BE SOMEBODY"). Ughly is as ughly does - and here there's wall to wall homely brother - trust me.

Rednecks eh?  

I retard my pickup truck not too long ago.
A chick gave me her number the udder day but disgust of wind came up and blew it away.
my girlfriendI prestige roses I gave her into a book.
I was eatin' hotdogs for lunch; I dont think distain will come out. 

My God...sounds like the break room banter at work...

So uncanny it's giving me chills...SCARY!...